Total Drama: Return of the Stars
by agreenparrot
Summary: 20 characters from the fics, Total Drama Refresh, Total Drama Stranded, and Total Drama Switcheroo will be returning to compete for a second time. The greatest heroes, the most dangerous villains, and some WTF choices. In a battle of strategy versus insanity.
1. Total Drama: Solar System

_Author's Note: Hey everyone. I know I said I wanted to focus on my current seasons, and don't worry I still plan to, but I got a lot of people asking for me to start All-Stars next, so I figured I'd get it rolling and see how it does. I may have to slow down to work on the others first, but for now here's the first chapter of Total Drama: Return of the Stars. It will feature characters from three of my previous fics, Total Drama Refresh, Stranded, and Switcheroo. Hope you enjoy ^_^_

The camera zoomed around a savage island in the middle of a barren lake. It dramatically showed mountains, forests, and swamps, before stopping at the dock where a handsome man with wavy black hair and a blue shirt was standing. He gave his trademark grin to the camera.

"Viewers, dedicated fans, welcome back to the show you all love," he exclaimed. "I'm Chris McClean and Total Drama is…back…in…action!"

Dramatic fanfare played while Chris struck a dashing pose.

"Over the seasons, we've had many different colourful casts," Chris said, "but this time…we're bringing people back…to form a super cast!"

Once again, he paused from dramatic effect.

"We've had three major seasons that have all been huge successes…some of them even transcended parallel universes…or some mumbo jumbo like that," Chris said. "Don't think too much about that, the fact is that we've got a cast of All-Stars coming back from three hit seasons."

Chris started to walk along the dock as he talked.

"First…there was Total Drama Refresh," as Chris spoke, scenes from the former season started to float by. "In this season, we tried to recreate the original success of Total Drama Island. The cast was filled with crazy wackos, cutthroat villains, and a few normal people who were just swept away in the insanity. In the end, our Australian visitor, Montana, used her energetic attitude to get herself the win."

Chris had reached the beach by now and paused again.

"Then there was Total Drama Stranded," Chris continued as new scenes appeared. "The campers became castaways as they had to provide for themselves. Shelters, food, everything; they were truly stranded. We had devious sneaks that were willing to do whatever it took, while we had those who truly played with honour and kindness. There were the popular kids, who battled to dominate the freaks and geeks of the cast. In the end, Calvin bullied his way to the win and claimed top spot. Then—"

"Then, we had Total Drama Switcheroo," someone else interrupted. "That's where I got to shine."

Chris turned to see a large, dark-skinned, man in a chef's outfit.

"Chef, what are you doing back…during MY intro?" Chris asked with frustration.

"You didn't think you were cutting me out of another season, did you?" he replied. "This is my show too."

"That's debatable," Chris grumbled.

"Debate with my contract," Chef grunted.

"Ugh, fine, you can stay," Chris sighed in defeat. "Just try not to cramp my style too much."

"As I was saying," Chef continued as new scenes appeared, "Total Drama Switcheroo was…crazy. Not one of those 16 kids was right in the head. The season combined real men's challenges, with…fancy techno-virtual stuff. It had some of the most dangerous villains, but some of the noblest heroes. In the end, the shy kid, Chance pulled through for the win."

"Now, let's get to meeting the contestants," Chris said. "I think I can see the boat arriving just now…"

An old, rickety, boat that looked ready to collapse at any second pulled up to the dock.

"Welcome…" Chris exclaimed. "…Blaineley?"

A woman with dyed blonde hair and a scarlet dress stepped out of the boat and onto the dock.

"Hello, dearies," she greeted.

Chris and Chef glanced at each other uncertainly.

"I'm back for MY show," she said.

"Um, perhaps you didn't understand," Chris said, "you're not a host anymore. We don't need you."

"Of course you need me," Blaineley replied. "Just think of what it'll do for your ratings."

"Are rating are through the roof as it is," Chris replied.

"Okay, look, here's the deal," Blaineley replied. "I was offered to star in the upcoming hit musical, 'Blainerifc, The Mildred Story: The Documentary: The Musical' but at the last second, they decided that I wasn't 'Blainerfic' enough, and now I need a new gig, so I threatened to sue until I got back my position, so here I am!"

"That's…quite the story," Chef said.

"And most of it's true too," Blaineley added. "So, let's get this show on the road, now that I'm here. Where's your worthless and boring cast this time?"

"Actually they haven't arrived yet," Chris said, clearly not happy to have to share the stage. "We were just waiting for them."

"Oh good, that means I get the chance to introduce each one," Blaineley exclaimed eagerly.

"Let's just get started," Chef grunted. "Here comes the boat."

"Right," Chris said as he fumbled through his notes, "first up…it's…from Total Drama Stranded…this boy was openly gay and not shy about showing it. His strategy was to flirt with other boys to throw them off guard. Underneath his cocky exterior, though, he actually a friendly guy, who was happy to help his friends. He battled against the 'Popular Boys' alliance and put up quite the fight, before his connection with the resident mastermind got him targeted. Give it up for…Stanley!"

A muscular both with smooth black hair stepped onto the dock. He had olive green eyes, and had a bright smirk on his face. He was wearing a grey tanktop, and green shorts with golden stripes.

"Welcome back, Stanley!" Chris exclaimed.

"Happy to be back, Chris," Stanley said, while giving a nod to each of the other hosts.

"So, are you planning to do anything differently this time?" Chris asked. "Think you can improve your game."

"I'm going to be playing a little more carefully," Stanley said. "I don't want to let anyone take advantage of me."

"Sounds good," Chris said.

"And we've got another one coming," Chef said as he took the notes from Chris. "And it's…oh god…this girl came to Total Drama Refresh just hoping to make friends, and maybe find her true love. While she started off shy and awkward, she soon became entitled…and even more awkward. She could be wrathful against those in her way, but in the end she was her own worst enemy when people couldn't stand her egotistical attitude and booted her at the final 7. You know who I'm talking about, it's Beatrice!"

A girl with chocolate brown hair down up in pigtails skipped off the boat. She wore a tubetop with sleeves along her wrists and arms, but disconnected at her shoulders. She wore a skirt, and go-go boots, everything was either red or pink.

"Hiiiii, Chris!" she exclaimed.

"Ugh, I'm getting a migraine already," Chef groaned as he messaged his temples.

"Happy to see you too, Cheffy!" Beatrice exclaimed brightly.

She then spotted Stanley.

"Omigosh!" she exclaimed as she ran over to him. "I know you, I saw you on TV!"

"Yes…and I saw you there too," Stanley replied.

"Wow, we have, like, so much in common!" Beatrice giggled. "I'm Beatrice!"

She held out her hand in a dramatic fashion. In fact, she over-exagerated and ended up hitting Stanley in the face and knocking him into the water.

"Omigosh…I am so, so sorry!" she exclaimed.

"Here we go again," Chef sighed.

"No seriously, I saw how I was acting last season," Beatrice said. "I was such a dorky klutz. But this time, you're going to see a new and improved Beatrice. Starting right now!"

To emphasize her point, she stomped her foot on the dock dramatically. Unfortunately, that was right where Stanley was trying to climb up. She ended up crushing his hand and sending him right back into the water.

"Eep, I didn't mean to do that!" Beatrice cried. "Here, let me help you."

"No! I mean…no, that's okay," Stanley replied. "Why don't you just…go stand…over there?"

"You're the boss," Beatrice chirped before saluting.

"Alright, I want a turn at announcing someone," Blaineley said as she grabbed the notes from Chris. "Ooh, we've got a good one here, a real drama starter…he played on Total Drama Switcheroo. Rather than playing the game, he preferred to just terrorize whoever he could find into doing what he wanted. He got a rush from inflicting pain, and yet in reality he had a deep-rooted fear of causing lasting damage, which could lead to him freezing up. All this together led to him being taken out before he could make merge…it's Mason!"

A boy with silver hair and mean brown eyes stepped off the dock. His face was covered with scars and bruises. He wore a navy jacket over a crimson shirt. His pants were black with chains hanging from his pockets.

"Mason, so glad to have you back," Blaineley exclaimed.

"Whatever, here I am," Mason grunted.

Stanley and Beatrice seemed uncertain what to make of Mason.

"Hi there!" Beatrice eventually said as she stepped forward.

"Don't," was all Mason said as he gave her an icy stare.

Beatrice immediately backed up.

"Ooh, he'll be fun," Blaineley whispered to Chris.

"Alright, my turn again," Chef said. "Oh-ho…this one is a special case. This girl played on Total Drama Refresh, and spent most of her time just trying to make friends and keep everyone happy. But she could be a tough force to be reckoned with when it came to challenges. She would go on to win the season…all the way from Australia, it's Montana!"

A girl with short burgundy hair and teal eyes cartwheeled out of the boat. She wore a green tanktop with a violet flowers on it. She wore khaki pants, and brown boots.

" 'Ello, 'ello, all you super people!" she exclaimed cheerifully.

"Montana, I love what you did with your hair," Chris said.

"Well, thanks, hun," Montana replied. "I thought I'd go for something a little different, right."

"Montana!" Beatrice exclaimed as she waved eagerly (elbowing Stanley back into the water in the process.) "Remember me?"

"Why, if it ain't lil' Bea!" Montana exclaimed.

The two girls hugged.

"Sorry 'bout how you went out last time," Montana said.

"Ancient history to me," Beatrice replied. "This is a new season, and a brand new Beatrice!"

"You brought a winner back?" Mason asked skeptically. "How is that fair?"

"It isn't," Blaineley said. "Which is why I love this show."

"Now, let's get back to me," Chris said as he reclaimed the notes. "Or more precisely, to our next returning star…this girl played by hiding her true nature. While actually a cutthroat gymnastic, used to doing whatever it takes to succeeds, this girl played up her cute nature to let her slide by. But her plan backfired when she found that no one was taking her seriously. By the time the merge arrived, she revealed her true nature and her true skillset. While an impressive physical force, she was far from popular, and no one wasted any time voting her out. Give it up for…Misha!"

A girl with light blonde hair, watery blue eyes, and smooth skin stepped off the boat. She wore a pink headband around her hair, and a skintight mauve bodysuit on her body.

"Misha!" Chris exclaimed.

"Chris," she grunted.

"So…I finally get to meet the REAL Misha," Stanley remarked.

"Yeah, that's right," Misha spat. "Here I am, take a good long. And if you don't like the real me, then you're just going to have to f**king deal with it."

"Oh she's unpleasant," Beatrice whispered to Montana.

"You got something to say!?" Misha snapped at Beatrice.

Beatrice clamped her hands over her mouth and shook her head.

"That's what I thought," Misha growled.

"Back to me now," Blaineley said while grabbing the notes. "Ooh, another good choice, if I do say…this guy was easily the villain of his season, Total Drama Swithcheroo. He blackmailed, manipulated, and lied his way across the game. While his plans didn't always work out, he still got himself all the way to the end…where he promptly was sent to third place. It's Gene!"

A dark-skinned boy with black, curled hair stepped onto the dock. He had beady green eyes and a firm frown. He wore a grey jacket over a brown shirt, and had green pants.

"Gene, ready to play again?" Blaineley asked.

"Ready to win is more like it," Gene replied.

"Bold statement," Blaineley said.

"Perhaps, but still very accurate," Gene said. "I made it all the way to the final 3 in my original season, and now that I have an even better idea of what I need to do, it should be easy."

"Well, that's quite the challenge you're throwing out," Blaineley said. "Do you think these guys have anything to say about that?"

Blaineley gestured to the already arrived contestants.

"Ha, don't make me laugh," Gene scoffed. "These people are nothing but a bunch of jokes. I can say how it is, I'm going to own this game and there's nothing they can do about it."

"You know…I did win my season, right," Montana pointed out.

"That's cute," Gene replied smugly.

"Ooh, he's going to win," Beatrice said to Montana.

"We'll just see about that," Mason remarked.

"Heh, I remember you," Gene said to Mason. "It was fun destroying you last time. I look forward to doing again."

"Oh yeah?" Mason growled. "Will I'm looking forward to sticking a branch right though your—"

"Ah, temper," Gene replied as he pat Mason on the shoulder. "Wouldn't want you to hurt yourself, now would we?"

Mason just simmered furiously.

"Now, let's continue," Chef said. "Up next…this girl started out Total Drama Refresh in a bad spot…she feared that her lack of physical strength might make her an easy target, however, her leadership skills saved her and by the merge she had the game in her hands. She very nearly made it to the end, and was cut out just at the final 3. Returning now is…Nicole!"

A girl with dark brown skin stepped onto the dock. She had wavy black hair with an indigo flower clipped to it. She had a thin pair of glasses, and wore an ebony black dress.

"Welcome back, Nicole," Chef said.

"It's good to be back, Chef," Nicole replied.

She then spotted Beatrice and Montana waving at her.

"We've got a real girl power thingamadoo going here, right," Montana remarked.

"Well, there are some girls from my season I'd hate to see back," Nicole shuddered. "But I'm happy to see you too again."

"Next up!" Chris announced. "Was a bit of darkhorse runner in his original season, Total Drama Stranded…this guy only wanted to sleep and do no work, no strategy, no nothing. This made him an early target, but due to a special twist he was brought back in at the merge. Suddenly, in a powerful position, he found that everyone wanted to be his best friend…but he couldn't take the pressure and took himself out again. Let's all welcome back…Riley!"

The boat arrived but no one got off.

"Riley!" Chris repeated.

Nothing happened.

"Ugh, remind me why we brought this guy back?" Chris groaned.

"I'll get him," Chef grunted as he marched onto the boat.

He came out with a Hispanic boy with red hair. He was only wearing red, button-up pyjamas. He was also in a deep slumber, Chef had to carry him and drop him off at the dock.

"Hey Riley," Stanley said. "Nice to see you again."

Riley snored in response.

"So, how exactly did this guy get as far as he did in his season?" Nicole asked in confusion.

"A better question would be, how the f**k did he outlast me!?" Misha scoffed.

"Right, that's very important," Nicole replied sarcastically.

"Don't sass me," Misha spat.

"Speaking of sass," Blaineley said, "this next girl has plenty of it…she had a passion for fashion, but once the game started, she became very passionate about removing the villains. Her team had its fair share, though, and this only put her in trouble. But she's back now, can she succeed this time? Only time will tell for…Zola!"

A plump, dark-skinned girl stepped off the boat. She had brown hair done up in a dreadlock ponytail. She wore all pink leather on her cap, jacket, and skirt. Everything was covered with pieces of gold. Underneath it all, she wore a black jacket.

"Yo, the Zola is back, baby!" she exclaimed.

"Ooh, fun," Gene remarked.

"You," Zola hissed as she narrowed her eyes at him. "I remember you."

"Really, because I don't seem to recall anything memorable about you," Gene said. "Maybe it was because you were a complete waste of my time from start to pitiful finish."

"Yeah, go ahead, laugh it up," Zola growled. "Just you wait. I'll have the last laugh. This is the season of the Zola!"

"You're just making this so much more fun to destroy you," Gene replied.

"Bring it on, baby," Zola said. "I'd like to see you try. I ain't letting no one get the drop on me this time."

"Well, speaking of villains, you're going to love this guy, Zola," Chris said. "On Total Drama Stranded, he played the ultimate mastermind game. Despite never truly holding a majority alliance, he almost always got the vote to go the way he wanted. He played by sticking to the shadows, and letting others spread his seeds of chaos. He is by far one of the most cutthroat players, and after he crashed and burned at the final 4, he's back for another shot. It's…Keith."

A miniscule boy skipped off the boat. He had fluffy platinum hair done up in a large ponytail. He wore a blue and whited striped hoodie, over a grey shirt, and wore green shorts.

"Hi, people!" he exclaimed with a playful grin. "I'm back!"

"He doesn't look like much," Gene scoffed.

"I know right," Keith laughed in response. "Poor lil' Keith was probably the first one gone on his original season. Oh wait, no I wasn't…how does third place sound?"

"I could do that," Gene replied.

"Aw, good for you," Keith continued with his sweet tone. "Just keep trying, I'm sure you'll get there some day. Of course, not this season, because obviously, I'm winning."

"I'd like to see you try," Gene scoffed.

"Thanks, I will!" Keith said brightly. "I'd say the same to you…except, I'd kinda rather if you didn't try, cause that would just be one less person I'd have to worry about, you know."

As Keith continued to walk along the dock, he spotted Stanley.

"Hey, Stanley, old buddy, old pal!" Keith exclaimed as he hopped over to him. "Remember me? Cause I sure remember you."

"Hello, Keith," Stanley sighed.

"Oh…you're not still mad about the whole 'pretending to being into you so I could keep your vote, and then indirectly getting you voted off' thing, are you?" Keith asked.

"What do you think?" Stanley replied.

"Well, you really shouldn't feel bad," Keith said. "In fact, you were one of the few people whose elimination I didn't plan. So good on you for that."

Keith gave a wink and thumbs-up to Stanley. The large boy just grunted in annoyance.

"Right, still mad, I understand," Keith said. "We'll have to talk about that, work past that, maybe be 'just friends,' for now."

Stanley just continued to stare through Keith.

"Let's keep this moving," Chef said, "next up we've got…wait, who? Huh…so this girl was from Total Drama Refresh, originally. She wasn't interested in playing the game, though, and would rather spend time on her electronic devices. She claimed that it was to keep her under the radar, which did work up until the merge where she ended up against a powerful girl's alliance. It's Sooz."

"And there we go," Nicole sighed in disappointment.

A tanned girl stepped off the boat. She had long frizzy black hair flowing down from a purple bandana. She wore golden hoop earrings, a misty purple tanktop, and navy jeans. She was also currently talking into her cellphone.

"Look, Fred, it's no big deal," she said into her phone. "I just have to go on this show for a few months, and I swear I'll be back in time for your recital…what do you mean, you'd rather go with Molly? What does she have that I don't…for the last time, it's just a few months…oh don't give me that…"

"Ahem," Chef said as he took the cellphone from her hand and crushed it.

"Eh, that was a disposable one anyways," Sooz remarked.

"Maybe this time you'll actually focus on the game," Chef said.

"Maybe this time I won't," Sooz retorted. "I'll probably still get farther than I did last time."

"So…first one gone?" Nicole whispered to Nicole and Montana.

"Let's not jump the gun yet, right," Montana replied.

"Right, there are plenty of candidates," Nicole said while glancing at Misha and then Riley.

Sooz didn't bother talking to anyone and just sat down and began playing with her iPod.

"Moving on," Chef said, "this next guy is…flamboyant. He likes to express himself, and his expression is almost always pure uncontained joy. His fun attitude got him caught in the crossfire on his original season, Total Drama Refresh. But he's back…and still happy as ever…it's Dirk!"

A tall boy with blonde hair, that seemed to swirl into a stack stepped off the boat. He wore a bright violet suit, with a crimson bowtie, and a pink heart on his belt.

"Hiiiii, everybody!" he laughed giddily. "I am just, like, so excited to be here. Like you have no idea I was all…Oh my god, I'm gonna be on Total Drama again!"

"Oh sweet Jesus, my eyes!" Zola cried. "What the hell are you wearing?!"

"You like it?" Dirk asked happily as he glanced at his suit.

"You look like Lady Gaga meets Willy Wonka meets a nuclear-powered blender set to puree," Zola spat.

"Aw, thank you," Dirk gushed.

"It wasn't a compliment," Zola said.

"Yes it was!" Dirk laughed.

"Ugh…crazy person," Zola grumbled under her breath.

"Looks like we finally got some male power going," Nicole remarked.

"Hi, Dirky!" Beatrice exclaimed as she waved.

"Who else do we have here?" Blaineley said. "Oh, another bullseye…this girl gives a new definition to the word 'deluded.' She wanted everyone to play nice and friendly, but she saw 'nice' in her own way, and her way was law. Anyone who dared to get on her bad side was in for a world of hurt. Her ballistic attitude made her plenty of enemies, and eventually they got her back just before the merge. Give it up for…Missy!"

A girl with brown hair tied into a tight ponytail stepped onto the dock. She was wearing a purple coat over a green shirt, and wore navy shorts. She had an icy glare in her blue eyes.

"Typical," she spat, "out of everyone you could choose, you just packed your season full of the worst slime you could find."

"Is she talking about me?" Beatrice gasped in hurt.

"Clearly, picking me was the one smart thing you did with this cast," Missy continued. "It's up to me to purge this cast of the evil you've filled it with, as I am clearly the only suitable winner here."

"Now listen here, you," Zola said. "If you're going to keep up that attitude—"

"Don't use that tone with me," Missy spat as she kicked Zola in the shin.

"Oooh, you little brat!" Zola hissed.

"You don't have the right to talk to me like that," Missy sniffed. "You are a wretched person."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Zola said, "back up a few kilometers…I was trying to get rid of the mean people."

"Oh sure, use that as an excuse," Missy scoffed. "Self-righteous people like you are just as bad as the meanies, if not worse. You think that just because you're got such a 'good cause' you can still act rude to whoever you want. Well sorry, but it doesn't work that way, so I suggest you clean up your act, or else I will be taking action against you."

"Ooh, this is getting good," Keith chuckled.

"And now," Chef said, "let's say hello to our next contestant…this guy was from Total Drama Refresh…starting out, he played the villainous card and tried to manipulate his way into power…but things backfired, and he ended up powerless at the merge. Suddenly, he was forced to fight to survive everyday…eventually, all his victims came back to bite him as he was pulled out of the game in the final 5…it's Edward!"

A boy with short, dirty blonde, neatly combed hair stepped off the dock daintily. He wore a brown sweater with a stripe across it, and black pants.

"Hello again, Edward," Chef said.

"Greetings, Chef," Edward said. "And greetings to all of you too…it's a pleasure to be joining you on this cast."

"Well, most of us," Nicole remarked under her breath.

Missy glared at Edward icily, but didn't say anything. Edward glanced at her awkwardly, before moving along the dock.

"Let's see, who's next," Blaineley said. "Seriously…who is this? Oh well, apparently she was on Total Drama Switcheroo…she was a big fan of Twilight, and could get vicious to anyone who badmouthed it. But underneath that, she was a sweet girl who was willing to make friends. She was caught in a crossfire and taken out early. She's back to get another shot, meet…Willow!"

A small girl with ebony hair that hung over the sides of her forehead stepped onto the dock. She had a crimson hairband and bow in her hair. She wore a navy sweater with a cyan diamond on it, and black shorts.

"Hi there!" she greeted.

"Welcome back, whoever you are," Blaineley said.

"It's me, Willow," she greeted.

"Not ringing any bells," Blaineley remarked. "But whatever, apparently you exist, so get over there with the others."

"I changed my mind about you," Gene said to Zola. "You're the second most irrelevant person I ever destroyed."

"Okay, you guys have hogged the screen long enough," Chris said. "Back to me now, please. Anyways, we've got another Total Drama Stranded player coming back…her strategy was to play the role of a loopy prophetess, who predicted her own demise. It was all a ruse though to get everyone off guard and get her to the end. She had to drop the charade by the merge, but that didn't make her any less of a fierce player. By playing hard, she got herself all the way to sixth place. You know her as Desdemona, but now she just goes by…Donna!"

An olive skinned girl with short, mousy brown hair stepped off the dock. She had deep green eyes, and a small smile. She wore a grey shirt, with a green eye pattern on the center, and jeans.

"Hello, everyone," she greeted. "It's just me this time. No gimmicks or facades, you're getting the real deal."

"Well, isn't that original," Misha remarked as she rolled her eyes.

"Hi, Des!" Keith exclaimed. "Remember me? Remember how you could never get rid of me no matter how hard you tried? Ready to do that again!?"

"I know your tricks this time," Donna replied.

"Ha, says that one-trick pony," Keith replied. "Please, you don't know have of what I've got in store."

"Then I'll just have to learn," Donna said. "I think I can take you."

"Ooh, up for a challenge are you?" Keith replied. "Have fun failing, I guess."

"Up next," Chef said, "is a guy from Total Drama Refresh…his strategy was to use his body to get himself ahead. He never even wore a shirt, and the girls were crazy for him…well, most of them. Some did more damage to him, and let to an ongoing rivalry. Yet in the end, he only has to blame his biggest fan for his elimination. We're talking about…Lionel!"

A muscular boy with light blond hair and blue eyes exited the boat. He was wearing a colourful Hawaiian shirt loosely over his body. Beneath that, he wore short teal shorts.

"Hello, ladies," he greeted.

"Whoa, he's hot," Stanley remarked.

"Don't bother with him," Nicole said. "His immature behaviour far outweighs his dreamy body, deep beautiful eyes, killer smile and…"

Nicole slapped herself.

"Get ahold of yourself, girl," she scolded herself.

"Hi, Lionel!" Beatrice greeted. "Sorry about…well, you know…the whole season."

"Don't worry you can make it up to me," Lionel said. "Just go jump off that cliff."

"Anything for you!" Beatrice exclaimed.

"Bea, we seriously need to have a talk about a little thing called 'feminism,'" Nicole said as she grabbed Beatrice and pulled her back.

"Moving along," Chris said, "this girl is from Total Drama Stranded, and she left her mark…she vowed to play with honour, and she did that. She stood up to the bullies on her tribe, and always worked hard to achieve tribe unity. She never got it, but hey, A for effort. She got herself all the way to the final 4, where she came in last place…but it's a whole new season for…Ilona!"

An girl with shoulder length brown hair, and tan skin stepped off the boat. She had a kind smile, and deep brown eyes. She wore a pink blouse, and a blue skirt.

"Ilona, you're not looking as rough as you did last time," Chris said.

"No thinks have really picked up for me," Ilona said. "I'm back on my feet, taking care of myself. I even volunteer at the local rec center teaching martial arts to kids."

"I bet you think you're so perfect," Missy growled. "And well…I have nothing to accuse you…but mark my words, I'll find something."

"I assure you, I'm far from perfect," Ilona said. "We all have flaws. I'm just trying my best to work with what I can."

"Ugh, she needs to get out fast," Edward remarked to Gene. "With a story like that, who could resisting just handing her the prize."

"I could," Gene replied.

"Right, I forgot that you're pure evil," Edward remarked.

"Next!" Chris exclaimed. "This guy was by far the biggest physical threat on his original season, Total Drama Stranded…he was a tank who plowed through challenges. He played a follower roll, to his tribes brutish leader, and always enforced his power. Thanks to the season's mastermind, though, he left the island with a broken leg. Well, he's all better now, so give it up for…JoJo!"

A tall muscular ball with shaggy blond hair stepped off the boat. He had deep blue eyes that were fixated into a scowl. He wore a dark green sweater with a red circle in the middle, and grey pants.

"It's just Joseph, actually," he said to Chris.

"Uh, okay…" Chris said. "Joseph, then…what's up?"

"Not much," Joseph shrugged. "You know…here to win…all that."

"Are you sure this is the same guy?" Chef whispered to Chris.

Chris just shrugged in response.

"Hello again, Jo—er, Joseph," Ilona greeted.

"Hey," he said. "Look…last season…I was pretty much a huge dick to you, you don't need to point that out. I just wanted to say that I'm sorry, and I'm not going to be like that this time."

"I'm happy to move forward," Ilona said. "If we can mend our frayed bonds, then I accept your apology."

"Well, I don't!" Missy spat.

"Uh, you weren't even on our season," Stanley pointed out.

"I still don't forgive this jerk!" Missy shouted. "He was nothing but a bully, and bullies need to be punished!"

"Um, hello…I had my leg broken," Joseph pointed out.

"By another villain…so really, that just cancels the whole thing out," Missy said. "If you really want to make amends, then you'd let someone noble, like me, break your leg again."

"Are you insane?" Joseph scoffed.

"Oh, so now you're moving onto derogatory comments, are you?" Missy continued. "Just as I suspected, so much for your phony apology."

"Perhaps you should calm down," Ilona suggested.

"No, perhaps you should calm UP!" Missy retorted. "This guy hasn't changed one bit, and I intend to see that he gets the karma he truly deserves!"

"Okay, we've got just one contestant left to introduce," Blaineley said. "This guy took OCD to…religious levels. Everything had to be perfectly organized and balanced for him…one little speck out of place, and he could be sent into a tantrum. This attitude caused friction early on with his other teammates and got him eliminated second. If he can keep his balance up, then he'll be second place this time…let's say hi to…Kyle!"

A boy with very neatly combed, golden-brown hair stepped onto the dock. He wore a tidy black suit with a red tie.

"Kyle, is that the same suit you wore last season?" Blaineley asked.

"No, it is not," Kyle replied. "I just have 31 identical suits, one for every day of the week."

"I see," Blaineley replied.

"Wait a minute!" Kyle gasped in horror as he spotted Chris. "What…what are you doing here!?"

"Um, I'm Chris McClean," Chris said. "This is my show, you know?"

"No, no, no, no!" Kyle pouted. "You can't be here!"

"Well, I am," Chris said.

"Ugh, it was so perfect, you finally had it perfect!" Kyle sobbed. "One male host, and one female host, perfect balance. Now it's all mucked up. Where's the balance between two male hosts and one female? There is none, that's where!"

"See what I had to put up with," Blaineley grunted to Chris.

"And just look at the whole lot of you," Kyle scolded. "Milling about without a care for actually organizing yourselves. Would it kill you to stand in rows of seasons, descending boot order, with girls on one side and boys on the other?"

Everyone looked around in confusion.

"Ugh, it couldn't be simpler," Kyle groaned.

"Okay, people, you're all here!" Chris exclaimed. "Take a look around, this is your All-Star cast. You've all played the game before, and now you'll be battling each other for another chance at the million dollars."

"But before we continue," Blaineley said. "We'd like to ask each of you to return to the Confession Cam, and let the audience know what you're thinking right now."

**Confessional:**

**Stanley-**I really need to pick up my game this time. I mean, Keith was dangerous enough on his own, but now I'm playing with people like Edward and Gene. I need to watch my back every step of the way.

**Beatrice-**I'm telling you right now, this is going to be the season of Beatrice! I don't even need to win, I just want to win, so that when people talk about this season, they'll say 'Oh yeah, that was the season with Beatrice.'

**Mason-**I've had it rough back at home, but I've learned from my mistakes and I'm ready to improve my game. This time, I'm actually in it to win, and I intend to play with that in mind.

**Montana-**It's just super-duper to me back. I mean, I know that some people think it's unfair to have a winner return, right, but I just say phooey to them. If I want to win again, then that's just what I'll do, right, right.

**Misha-**Last time I played it stupid. What the f**k was I thinking with that idiotic strategy. This time I'm just going to flat out say it, 'Yeah, I'm the strongest person on your tribe, and if you want to win challenge, you'd better f**king keep me around.'

**Gene-**Last time I played, things didn't always go my way, but I was resilient enough to get to the end…and I only lost because it was a cheap challenge. I just need to do that again, and this time I'm sure it'll be something that I can excel at.

**Nicole-**I began a bit of a cutthroat last time, and while I don't want to do that again, I do want to play a strong strategic game. I'm going to be making moves, so watch out.

**Riley-**Why am I here?

**Zola-**Ooh, you just had to bring back all your beloved villains, didn't you? Cuz of the drams and the ratings and all that jazz. Well, you're out of luck, cuz the Zola is here and I ain't taking any of that crap this time.

**Keith-**Cute cast you got here. I find it funny how you used the term, All-Stars, though. It's more like Total Drama: Solar System, one star, me, and the rest will just orbit around me.

**Sooz-**(on phone) Molly, you listen to me, if you even think of making a move on Fred, I will get you…oh, you're not scared….is that so….well, I'll have you know that I can still send you a threatening email from here…yeah, think about it.

**Dirk-**Eeeeee, being back here is the greatest feeling ever. And not only am I with my old pals from Refresh, I get to meet my favorites from Stranded and Switcheroo…this has got to be a dream, oh somebody pinch me.

**Missy-**Total Drama is such an awful program. It's always focused on the villains and glorifies people who play dirty. Well, it's your rules now, so I'm going to play as dirty as you want to get rid of all these meanies. It's only fair.

**Edward-**Last time I played too hard too fast. I made myself a target and things fell apart. I'm willing to take things a little slower this time, and make sure I get right where I want to be.

**Willow-**I realize that the most memorable thing about me may have been Twilight, but there's more to me than just that and you'll see it…although, Twilight is still amazingly awesome, Edward Cullen is still my future husband, and Stephanie Meyer is still our God.

**Donna-**Sure, last time I got far because I played a façade, I'll admit that. But I didn't just make that up on the spot, I came up with it because I know how this game works and how these people thing. I don't need a fancy dress to win them over.

**Lionel-**This time I'm taking charge. I'm not letting anyone boss me around; I'm going to be the man on my team.

**Ilona-**As always, I hope to play a peaceful game with honour. I can tell though, that with these people that may not be a possibility. But you can count on me to do what I can to keep tensions at a low.

**Joseph-**A lot of stuff happened to me back home…I don't really want to talk about it…but I'm not on the football team anymore, and I'm a different guy than I was last season.

**Kyle-**Clearly, I have my work cut out for me, but mark my words, when I'm done here, this season will be perfectly balanced…(pulls out ruler) and why is this outhouse not a perfect square!?

"Okay, we're back," Chef said as the twenty campers waited on the dock. "Now, we need you to get into two groups. On the left….Stanley, Zola, Nicole, Gene, Edward, Willow, Keith, Misha, Donna, Lionel…"

The ten selected contestants shrugged and took their spots.

"Leaving on the right," Chef continued, "Beatrice, Mason, Ilona, Joseph, Sooz, Riley, Montana, Missy, Dirk, Kyle."

"You see," Chris said, "all of you were selected for a reason…uh, except you, Willow, you're here because Simone canceled last minute and we needed a replacement."

"Aren't I special?" Willow replied.

"But as it stands, you have been divided into two groups based on your gameplay in your original season," Blaineley continued. "On the left, you all played knowing exactly what kind of strategy you had in mind, and you worked hard to take control of the game…you shall now be known as…Team Cutthroat!"

A green icon with a cutlass appeared beneath them.

"On the right," Blaineley continued, "you all played much crazier games. Whether you were emotional players, floaters, or just plain psycho. You all were unpredictable at times, and you made your teams that much more chaotic…you shall be known as…Team Trainwreck!"

A yellow icon with a train appeared beneath the new team.

"Now, we can begin!" Chris exclaimed.

"Um, Chris?" Beatrice exclaimed as she raised her hand. "I hate to be a bother, but I think you made a mistake with the teams."

"What do you mean?" Chris asked.

"Well, clearly I'm on the wrong one," Beatrice said. "I played an epic strategic game."

"Uh, Bea, let's look back, shall we?" Chris said. "You came to the game looking for a boyfriend, when you couldn't get one you threw a tantrum and attacked anyone close to you, you then knocked the boy of your dreams out cold with a frying pan, thus eliminating him, when on a crazy ego-trip, only to get eliminated. Sounds like a textbook definition of a trainwreck to me."

"Well, that was all editing," Beatrice pouted. "What about all the smart stuff I did?"

"No amount of editing could make you look smart," Chef remarked.

"Look, the teams have been sit all nice and organized," Chris said, "so, unless someone else wants to switch—"

"I'll do it," Nicole offered.

"Wait? What?" Chris said.

"Sure, why not?" Nicole replied. "We're from the same season, and the same gender, everything will still be organized."

"Yeah but…the teams will…fine, whatever," Chris sighed. "If it'll make you happy, switch teams, we've got a show to run here."

Beatrice and Nicole smiled at each other as they traded spots.

"Now," Chris said, "we are ready to begin…this is going to be one epic summer, so get ready for Total Drama: Return of the Stars!"

_Author's Note: So there you have it, that's the start of the season. What do you think? Happy to see any favorites back? Anyone surprise you? I'll try to finish this episode soon, then I'll decide what my next step should be._


	2. Villain Central

_Author's Note: And here is the conclusion to the premiere of Total Drama: Return of the Stars. Hope the series continues to live up to expectations, and I'll continue to try to keep it updated._

Chris stood at the edge of the dock on the new island.

"Welcome back to the double feature premiere of Total Drama: Return of the Stars!" Chris exclaimed. "Last time we introduce 20 of the biggest…well mostly…names from the past three seasons to compete."

"And things were off to a smashing start already," Blaineley said as she stepped in front of Chris. "Huge villains like Keith and Gene are ready to take charge of the game again. While heroes like Ilona and Zola are determined to keep things under control. Then we've got people like Beatrice who just wants to make an impact on the game."

"The campers were divided into two teams," Chef explained. "The most strategic players…and Beatrice…on Team Cutthroat, and the crazier bunch, plus Nicole, on Team Trainwreck."

"Everyone's bringing a bit of experience back into this, so it's not going to be your typical season," Chris said. "The question is, who has the skills to get themselves to the end of a cast full of champions?"

"Today they'll have their first challenge," Chef said. "And it'll give us our first glimpse and how everyone wants to play the game."

"As well, we'll have our first boot," Blaineley said. "It's one thing to be gone first on a season, but to be the first boot on an All-Star season has got to hurt."

"All that is coming up," Chris said, "so keep watching the season premiere of…Total Drama: Return of the Stars!"

(**Theme Song Plays…**)

* * *

(Team Cutthroat)

The team of ten trekked through the woods together.

"Okay, guys, we have our instructions," Lionel said to them. "We need to find our camp first before we can start the challenge."

"Got it," Keith said as he hung from a branch. "Let's make sure we don't get lost. That would suck."

"Let's just make sure we stick together," Lionel said. "Don't need people trailing off."

"Actually, I was thinking maybe I could scout ahead," Keith said. "Take a look through the trees, see if I can find anything."

"Bah, waste of time," Misha grunted. "Just follow me and we'll be fine. I know what I'm doing!"

As the team traveled through the savage forest, they began to disperse a bit. Misha and Lionel both held a strong lead. Stanley followed behind them. Gene, Edward, Beatrice, and Willow all walked in the middle of the group, while Zola and Donna brought up the rear. Keith preferred to travel by the trees.

"So, um, uh…hi there!" Beatrice exclaimed as she walked up to Willow.

"Hey," Willow replied. "You're Beatrice, right?"

"That's me," Beatrice replied. "So, um…I like your hairdo. It's super stylish."

"Well thank you," Willow giggled. "I like your pigtails."

"Seriously?" Beatrice exclaimed in awe. "That's so nice of you to say. By the way, will you be my new best friend?"

"Omigosh, what a coincidence, I was just thinking how I needed a new bestie," Willow exclaimed. "Since my old one couldn't make it."

"OMG, I always wanted to be somebody's bestie!" Beatrice exclaimed. "This is so excited for me!"

"I know right, this is going to be great!" Willow replied. "So, do you like Twilight?"

"YES!" Beatrice exclaimed. "I love Twilight!"

"You know what's great? So do I!" Willow chirped.

"Wow, we have, like, so much in common!" Beatrice replied. "Isn't Jacob the hottest?"

"Oh he's my future second husband," Willow exclaimed. "Right after Edward, of course."

Up ahead of them, Gene was rubbing his temples in frustration.

"Ugh, I can't take any more of this," he groaned. "Do they ever shut up?"

"Just be glad she's not laughing yet," Edward remarked to him. "That laugh still haunts my nightmares."

"Well, I can't wait to be rid of at least one of them soon," Gene grunted. "Preferably both."

"You sound confident," Edward remarked.

"Please, I am a master strategist," Gene replied. "They're a couple of braindead girls."

"Well, it just so happened that my game was screwed over by a braindead girl," Edward pointed out. "So don't underestimate them."

"Newsflash, I'm not you," Gene replied. "I actually know what I'm doing, and I'm going to get exactly what I want."

"Sure, good luck with that," Edward said.

Bringing up the rear, Zola was having trouble keeping up. She leaned against a tree as she breathed heavily.

"Are you feeling alright?" Donna asked. "Do you need a hand?"

"Whoa, no one asked for your help!" Zola exclaimed as she shooed Donna away.

"Just checking on you," Donna said. "We don't need someone collapsing on the first day."

"Suuuure, I'm sure that's exactly how you feel," Zola said sarcastically.

"What are you talking about?" Donna asked.

"I saw your season, and I'm just letting you know that your mumbo-jumbo, hocus-pocus, voodoo spells ain't gonna work on me," Zola said.

"Look," Donna tried to say, "I'm just trying to—"

"You may have changed your fashion, but you're still the same, I can tell," Zola said. "And speaking of fashion, that dress you were wearing was the most hideous, tacky piece of rubbish I've ever seen…but at least it held some personality. What you're wearing now has been completely sucked dry of any flavour. Welcome to bland town."

"Oh so you want to talk about fashion now, do you?" Donna said getting irritated. "Well, tell me this, how many alligators did you have to kill to get that much leather? I'm sure PETA is a huge fan of you and your wardrobe."

"Bah, you don't have the right to talk to me about fashion like that," Zola scoffed. "I've got my eye on you…so don't try to pull anything."

"I'm so scared," Donna replied dryly.

Up front, Keith was swinging by Stanley.

"Hey, Stan Man, I think we should talk," he said.

"What's there to talk about?" Stanley asked.

"I just don't want to get off on such a bad foot with you," Keith said. "We're both back on the same team now, can't we have a fresh start."

"Sorry, but you used me," Stanley said. "And not just me, but you ended up betraying a lot of people to get yourself ahead. How am I supposed to trust you now?"

"Okay, right, that's fair enough," Keith said. "But I just want you to give me another chance. This is a new season, and I don't want to be picked on and taken out first just for how I acted last time. Isn't that fair?"

"Sounds fair to me," Stanley said. "But it's still not going to happen."

Up front, Lionel and Misha were both trying to lead.

"Are you sure we're going the right way?" Lionel asked.

"Yes, I'm sure, not stop asking!" Misha snapped.

"I'm just saying, it's easy enough to get off course," Lionel said. "Maybe we could—"

"We don't have time to waste!" Misha snapped again. "I am not losing my first challenge!"

"Yeah, you'd better hope so," Lionel scoffed.

"What was that?" Misha hissed.

"I'm just telling it how it is," Lionel said. "We lose, and you're going home first."

"So, you're threatening me?" Misha growled.

"Maybe I am," Lionel countered.

"Well, I'd be careful about who you piss off," Misha said icily. "Now shut the f**k up and keep moving!"

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Beatrice-**Eeee, I've made myself a new friend…not just a friend, but a bestie! This time I'm not gonna screw it up, I'm going to be the best bestie who ever bested.

**Willow-**Beatrice seems like a really sweet girl. I really miss my old gal pal, Simone, but nothing wrong with having two besties.

**Gene-**These people are all in for a wakeup call. I'm going to take control of this game, and then one by one, I'll remove exactly who I want.

**Edward-**I'm actually really glad with the team I've got. With people like Gene trying to be big and bad, that means that I can weasel on by.

**Zola-**I told myself that I wasn't gonna let no villains run the show this time, and Imma stick to that…but you hosts and your little twists stuck me right in the middle of Villain Central. I bet you're loving this aren'tcha? Well, I ain't gonna be no pushover this time, they're in for a fight.

**Donna-**Ugh, I've only known Zola a few minutes and I already can't stand her. Like apparently there's a law against offering to help people? I know right, so evil.

**Keith-**I've got a lot of damage control…and the season just started. I'm looking like a prime target if we lose, but luckily I've perfected the art of escaping elimination. It'll just take a little work, but I'll find someone else to take the fall.

**Stanley-**I'd like to believe that Keith has turned over a new leaf, but that would be just plain stupid. He lied, manipulated, and backstabbed his way to the end of his first season. Sure some of it is personal, but the rest is just plain common sense.

**Lionel-**Last season I had to put up with a psycho named Sophie, and I'm getting a lot of the same vibes from Misha. I am not going through that again. If we lose this challenge, then I will do everything in my power to send Misha home first!

**Misha-**Lionel is a complete and total f**king idiot. I am the most athletic person on this tribe, and I just need to prove that. Once I do, I've got a free ride right to the merge.

* * *

(Team Trainwreck)

Like the other team, Team Trainwreck was making their way through the woods as they searched for their campsite. Mason and Ilona were walking in the lead. Joseph and Dirk followed behind them. Missy, Kyle Nicole, and Montana all walked in the middle. Sooz trailed behind, and Riley was nowhere to be seen.

"So, Montana, you're the only previous winner here," Nicole noted. "How's that feel?"

"I feel special," Montana replied. "Clearly, I've got to live up to if I'm gonna break my record, right."

"Um…I don't think that's possible," Nicole remarked.

"Of course not," Kyle interjected. "She will be the first one gone."

"Why, that's a little mean to say, don't you think?" Montana asked.

"Not at all," Kyle replied. "It's simply the law of balance. You won last time and you are the only one here to do so, therefore you are the only logical candidate for the first one to boot."

"Well, I'll just have to try a little harder then, right," Montana laughed.

"Please don't," Kyle said. "I'd really rather you not just to interfere with the laws of balance. It just makes things messy."

Sooz was coming up behind them on her phone.

"Look, Carly, I need that dress before September," Sooz said to her phone. "No, it can't be in blue, we had a deal, it needs to be pink…Not my colour? Where do you get off telling me what my colour is—Oof!"

Sooz collided with Missy.

"Hey, watch where you're going!" Missy snapped.

"Um, can't you see that I'm on the phone?" Sooz scoffed at Missy. "Sorry, Carly…you were saying?"

"Hey, pay attention to me when I'm talking to you!" Missy shouted.

But Sooz just kept on walking past her.

"Hey, get back here!" Sooz shouted.

"Okay, let's just take a chill pill," Montana said as she dragged Missy aside.

"I don't need a chill pill," Missy pouted. "But that brat needs a kill pill."

"You seem very angry, right," Montana noted. "Whatever happened to that happy fairy girl?"

"Bah, there's a time and place for everything," Missy scoffed. "And happiness and sparkles do not belong on Total Drama clearly."

"Aw, sure they do," Montana said as she gave a grin. "Look at how happy I am."

"They you must be delusional or something," Missy scoffed. "I tried that, and I found that this is only an environment of cruelty and suffering. Everyone here is selfish and only cares about themselves, which is why I'm needed to bring some dose of positivity for the fandom to root for."

"I think you're going about this all the wrong way, right," Montana said. "There's plenty to enjoy about this show, you just need to find it."

"Easy for you to say," Missy grumbled, "seeing as you won."

Meanwhile, Dirk was trying to engage Joseph in conversation.

"So, you're, like, the quarterback, eh?" Dirk asked. "Big man on campus, and all that."

"Not anymore," Joseph shrugged.

"Really? What do you mean?" Dirk asked.

"I mean I'm not on the football team back home," Joseph said.

"Oh, that's a real shame," Dirk remarked. "How come?"

"I guess…it just wasn't the environment that was right for me," Joseph replied. "Whatever. It's not important. I'm here now."

"That's right, and isn't that exciting!" Dirk exclaimed. "Think you're gonna win? I know I'm gonna give it 110% at, like, everything."

"Definitely," Joseph replied with determination. "Failure isn't an option for me."

"Ooh, fierce, I like that," Dirk remarked.

"Stop everything!" Kyle shouted.

Everyone stopped in their steps. Kyle then proceeded to count everyone.

"We are missing someone," he exclaimed. "This will not stand!"

Everyone glanced around.

"Where's that sleep guy?" Nicole asked. "Riley?"

"Maybe he fell asleep," Ilona suggested.

"Ha, funny," Nicole scoffed.

"I was serious," Ilona replied. "You don't know this guy, he will seriously just drop and sleep whenever he wants."

"Do you think he fell behind?" Montana asked.

"I'll go get him," Joseph said.

He walked back the way they had come, eventually he found Riley sleeping against a tree.

"Hey man, get up," Joseph said as he shook him.

Riley just snored in reponse.

"Dude, we need to keep moving," Joseph said.

Riley gave no response.

"Fine," Joseph sighed as he picked him up and slung him over his back and carried him back to the group.

The group continued to travel, but soon stopped again.

"I swear, we are going in circles," Mason said. "I have seen this same tree three times."

"No, it's just a coincidence," Ilona said. "Trust me, I know what I'm doing."

"Really? Because I think that you're just getting us lost," Mason said. "We can't waste time, and that's exactly what we're doing."

"Look, we're not going to arrive there in a few minutes," Ilona said. "We need to be patient and just trust me."

"Why is it you we need to trust?" Mason asked. "Why don't _you_ trust _me_? And I say we need to change direction."

"Because that will get us lost," Ilona replied. "I want to win just as much as you do, but we can't do that if we keep bickering like this."

"But only if we do things your way," Mason remarked sarcastically.

"Look, you just need to have faith in me," Ilona said. "We're not going to get anywhere if we don't have a leader, and I think I'm best suited for that responsibility. I will accept full blame if we lose this challenge, but we're not going to get anywhere if we don't keep moving."

"Fine," Mason said reluctantly. "But you better not let me down."

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Nicole-**Switching to this team was the first smart thing I did this season, but it won't be the last. Who would want to be on a team of strategists? Over on this team, I've got the clearest head so I'll be able to take the lead over everyone here.

**Kyle-**My goal this season is to make sure everything plays out orderly. Last season was a complete wreck, and I clearly need to try harder. But this will be the season of balance!

**Montana-**Last season I had Parry to work with. I got that little guy to go from frowns to smiles. I miss him out here, but now I've got Missy to work with, right. I'm sure I'll be able to bring up her friendly side.

**Missy-**Sure, it would be great if we could all be best friends and have a great time together, but I've seen these people in action, and I already know their true colours. I'm the only true nice out here, and all the rest are just a bunch of meanies.

**Sooz-**I am not getting myself involved in the drama this time. If I want drama I can check the tabloids on my phone. But when push comes to shove out here, I am backing myself out of there and leaving the fights to everyone else.

**Joseph-**Lately I've had to spend a lot of time worrying about college and getting my grades up. Because of that, I've had to drop out a lot of the things I love. This could be my last big competition for a while, so I need to make sure I go out with a bang.

**Dirk-**Ooh, Joseph is such a tough guy, always good to have a big guy on your team. I'm sure he's gonna, like, go all tank again and carry us to victory. It'll be, like, just super!

**Riley-**(asleep) Mom, can't I stay home today?

**Ilona-**I don't think I'm going to get along with Mason at all. He's a troublemaker and he just likes picking fights. If he's going to keep up that attitude that I'll have to deal with him.

**Mason-**Ugh, I hate people telling me what to do, and Ilona is just terrible. Did anyone ask her to be leader? No, she just stepped up because she needs to be in control. I'll knock her off her post though.

* * *

(Team Cutthroat)

The team had continued to travel, but saw no sign of a camp.

"Come on, keep it up, you lazybones," Misha grumbled. "We've got to be getting there soon."

"Maybe everyone would benefit from taking a break," Stanley suggested. "We could all rest our legs for a bit."

"No," Misha scoffed. "That's stupid. We're not going to get anywhere by sitting around."

"Well, it's sure a good thing that you're not the leader, then," Lionel said. "Take five everyone!"

"Grrr," Misha growled as she glared at Lionel.

The rest of the team was happy to stop and rest though. Everyone caught up, then began to spread out and sit down under the trees. Stanley was about to sit down and rest, when someone grabbed him from behind.

"Come with me, hun," Zola said as she dragged him.

"You too," she said to Willow as she grabbed the other girl as well.

Zola took both of them off to the side where they could talk in private.

"Alright, listen up, y'all," Zola said. "As you both know, trust is a major issue in this game, and if I'm going to work with people, I want to be people who are honest and loyal."

Stanley and Willow both nodded a little uneasily.

"Out of everyone here, I think that you two are the most trustworthy," Zola said. "Willow, we were on the same season, didn't talk much, but I can tell that you mean well. And Stanley, from what I saw of Stranded, you're a loyal fellow."

"So…this is like an alliance?" Stanley asked.

"Let's just keep in on the DL for now," Zola said. "I just want to watch each other's backs. Make sure we don't go out prematurely."

"You can count on me," Willow said with a salute. "You all seem like really neat people, and I'll try to help you out. We can be like a wolf pack."

"Eh, wolves are cliché," Zola remarked.

"You have something better?" Willow asked defensively.

"…I'll sleep on it," Zola said. "But for now, we're good. Let's just help each other out and survive these first days."

"Sounds good," Stanley said with a nod.

Meanwhile, Donna had spotted Gene sitting by himself under a tree.

"Okay, time to work my magic," she said to herself.

She then walked up to him and leaned against the tree.

"Hey there, sexy," she said.

"Hi," Gene replied uninterestedly.

"So, what're you doing sitting all alone?" Donna asked as she got in close with him.

"Um, I have a girlfriend back home," Gene pointed out as he pushed Donna back.

"And I've got a boyfriend," Donna replied, "but we can pretend otherwise."

"I'd rather not," Gene said as he tried to move away from Donna.

"Hey guys!" Keith exclaimed as he dropped out of the tree and landed between them.

"Oh, hi," Donna said.

"So, what's up?" he asked. "Is being a flirt you're new façade this time?"

"I don't have a façade," Donna replied.

"Oh, so you're always that awkward?" Keith remarked. "Oops."

"What are you getting at?" Donna asked.

"Just saying, you might want to work on your façade is you're hoping to make merge again," Keith said.

"Well, I'll just leave you two lovebirds be," Gene said as he turned to leave.

"Ah, going to plan some evil plan now?" Keith asked.

"Oh please, I'm not evil," Gene scoffed. "Just because I'm playing the game to win, people are jumping all over me."

"Right, just like me," Keith remarked. "But I have the same advice to you; you might want to come up with some sort of evil plan if you want to actually survive to the merge…or even to tomorrow."

By another tree, Beatrice had approached Edward.

"Hey there, Eddie!" she exclaimed.

"Eddie?" Edward echoed.

"Yeah, we're from the same season, right? We're old friends," Beatrice said. "Friends give each other nicknames."

"We were never friends," Edward said coldly.

"You can call me Bea, or Trice, or Atri, or…" Beatrice listed.

"That's great, Beatrice, but why don't you take this elsewhere?" Edward said as he as he pushed her away.

"Please, it's just Atri to you," Beatrice replied with a laugh.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Misha-**Lionel is seriously getting on my nerves. If he keeps this up, I will have to destroy him!

**Lionel-**If this team is going to have a leader, it's going to be me. I am not taking orders from anyone this time.

**Zola-**I really need to rally up the good people out here. That was the problem last season, everyone was too busy fighting to realize who the real threat was. Well, Imma put my foot down this time.

**Stanley-**An alliance with Zola might actually be a good idea. She may seem brash, but I think she has good intentions. And if it keeps me safe, then it all works out for everyone.

**Willow-**Yay, I've got an alliance and a bestie now. This season is gonna be as great as rereading Breaking Dawn for the fifth time…well, maybe not that good, but close.

**Donna-**Sure, I'm still with Elijah from last season, but he'd want me to pull out all the stops to win this thing. And right now I feel like the flirt card is my best option. Gene may not be interesting, and Stanley's out of the question, but there are other boys out here too.

**Keith-**I just need to keep everyone on their toes right now. I need to get the right people to like me, but also to get the right people riled up so that conflicts get brewing and the target is right off my back.

**Gene-**I guess I've just got a natural allure for the ladies, but I didn't come here for adultery, I came here to play and win this game.

**Edward-**Beatrice is such a pain…I suppose I should look on the bright side and say that if she likes me then at least she won't vote for me, but still, I do not want to have to put up with her anymore that absolutely necessary.

**Beatrice-**Aw, Eddie doesn't seem to want to talk right now. I wonder if he's mad at me about something…or maybe he's just weird…that's probably it.

* * *

(Team Trainwreck)

The two had also been traveling for some time, and were only getting deeper into the woods without finding anything new.

"We've been walking a long time now," Nicole sighed as she leaned against a tree. "I'm getting pretty exhausted here."

"Yes, and notice how we still haven't found anything," Mason pointed out. "For all we know, we could just be walking in circles."

"Will you let it go already?" Ilona sighed.

"I'm just saying," Mason remarked.

"Look, why don't we all just take a few minutes to rest up," Ilona said. "We could still have more of a trek ahead of us, so if you're feeling tired, we might as well take a quick break."

Everyone dispersed out around the area and began to relax on the ground. Joseph placed Riley down who finally began to stir.

"Uh…where am I?" he moaned.

"You're awake!" Dirk exclaimed eagerly as he got in Riley's face. "So nice to finally get to talk to you, I'm Dirk, by the way."

"Uh…hi," Riley said as he carefully pushed Dirk aside.

"Dude, you were out cold," Joseph said to Riley.

"Yeah, I had a nice nap," Riley said.

"Well, you can't just do that in the middle of a challenge," Joseph said. "Not if you want to win."

"Eh, I don't really care about winning," Riley remarked.

"I see," Joseph said. "Well then, you're headed for an early elimination."

"Fair enough," Riley shrugged.

Meanwhile, Nicole had gathered up Sooz and Montana.

"Hello again, girls, looks like we're all in this together again," she said.

"Huh?" Sooz grunted without lifting her eyes from her phone.

"I mean, we're all from the same season, we're all friends…er, well, on friendly terms," Nicole said. "Everyone else probably has bonds from their own seasons, so I'm just saying it might be in our best interests to stick together."

"Well, I wouldn't say for sure that the others have particularly strong relationships," Montana said as she glanced over at Missy and Mason.

Missy was currently glaring at Mason intently.

"What?" the boy asked.

"I'm watching you," Missy hissed. "One little slipup and I'll be on you!"

"I haven't even done anything," Mason remarked.

"No, but don't you try anything," Missy replied.

"You don't have any right to tell me what to do," Mason scoffed.

"Actually I have all the right to do so," Missy said. "You see, you are a flawed, awful person, and as a kindhearted individual, it is my duty—no my responsibility—to send you in the right direction."

"What the hell are you even talking about?" Mason spat.

"I know it seems like a futile task, but someone's got to do it," Missy said.

"Beat it," Mason grunted.

"Sorry, I'll take care of her," Montana said as she grabbed Missy's ponytail and dragged her away.

"Ow! What was that for?!" Missy snapped at Montana.

"Well…I just didn't think you were making a very pleasant impression of yourself, right," Montana said. "You won't be making any friends that way."

"I don't want to make friends with these jerks, I want them to suffer!" Missy spat. "I want them to face judgement for their sins!"

"Right…that might just be a tad harsh, don't you think?" Montana said.

"No, I don't," Missy replied.

"Right then," Montana said at a loss for words.

While this was going on, Kyle approached Ilona.

"Hello," he said.

"Hi," Ilona said. "What can I do for you?"

"Nothing," Kyle said. "But we're the only two people not in conversation. I felt that we ought to remedy that."

"Ah," Ilona said with an uncertain nod.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Joseph-**I knew Riley back from Stranded, and he seems like a cool dude, but he needs to pick up his act if he wants to survive this game. We can't afford slackers on our team.

**Riley-**I didn't even want to come to this game again. I mean, now that I'm here if I win the million dollars then I'll take it, but don't expect me to do anything.

**Dirk-**I just love meeting all these new people and making new friends. It's such a colourful cast, this season is going to be, like, the bomb.

**Nicole-**I don't really care for Sooz, but that's not important for the sake of alliances. I need a sturdy base for the start of the game so I'm not scrambling later down the line. We're all from the same season so we've got that going, if we all work together, we can all go far in this game.

**Sooz-**Yeah, sure, whatever, I'll agree to any alliances if they're going to keep me safe. But don't expect me to make any big moves. I'll leave that to the powerplayers so they can take the blame, not me.

**Montana-**Missy has a very…odd way off looking at life. But I feel like with a little help, she'll be able to see all the good and fun things about people too, right.

**Missy-**It's just sickening to think that people like Mason have gotten barely any comeuppance for all the things they've done. I mean, sure he got roughed around a bit, big deal, he belongs in prison if you ask me.

**Mason-**Missy is the biggest hypocrite you'll ever meet. I swear, the girl needs to be on medication.

**Ilona-**There may be some troublestarters on my team, but there are also some really decent folks too. I think if I just look for the good in people, I'll be able to do just fine out here.

**Kyle-**I have nothing to say, but everyone else got a confessional, so it's only fair that I get one too or else everything would be off-put.

* * *

(Team Cutthroat)

The team had continued moving again since their break and were starting to climb up some rocks.

"I think I see something," Lionel said. "Just ahead, I think it's a cabin."

"Well, enough gawking, let's get there already," Misha said.

Misha scampered towards it eagerly and Lionel followed. The others soon came behind. Zola had a bit of trouble getting herself over the rocks, though.

"Hey…wait up," she huffed.

Stanley paused and offered his hand.

"Thanks, hun," she said as she grabbed it and helped herself up.

The ten teens made it up the rocky hill and found themselves at a clearing with a cabin in the center. Blaineley was waiting outside. Also of note, the entire clearing was filled with painted green rocks of various sizes.

"Welcome, Team Cutthroat," Blaineley greeted. "This will be your home for the rest of your stay. You may go inside and take some time to get settled before we begin the real challenge."

The teens happily entered the cabin. It was slightly rustic with its old wooden floors and walls, but everyone was just happy enough to see beds.

"This is great," Stanley said as he collapsed on a mattress in relief. "No more sleeping outside."

"I don't know," Keith remarked. "There's something homey that I'm going to miss about sleeping in the trees."

"That's because you're a freak," Edward scoffed.

"Ooh, ooh, pillow fight!" Beatrice exclaimed as she grabbed a pillow and tossed it at Willow.

However, the other girl ducked and the pillow end up slamming into Gene's face.

"Oops…uh, sorry," Beatrice said.

"Hm…this place is…adequate," Zola noted. "But the design does seem a little tacky and out of date. I would have thought that Chris might have learned to change it up a bit after so many seasons."

"Do you ever stop complaining?" Donna groaned. "Like seriously? Ever?"

"I'm not complaining, I'm criticizing, there's a difference," Zola declared.

"Yeah, one's rude, and one makes you a self-righteous prick," Donna scoffed under her breath.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Stanley-**Back on Stranded we hardly got any luxury at all. Just the fact that we've got a decent shelter and soft beds is a huge improvement for me.

**Zola-**I'm just saying, would it kill you to put some hanging lanterns around here? And whatever happened to shag carpet, that's gonna make a comeback, baby, mark my words.

**Donna-**Ugh, I can't believe I have to spend a whole summer with that woman. She is the most entitled whiner I have ever met in my life.

* * *

(Team Trainwreck)

"Are we there yet?" Riley moaned.

"Does it look like we're there?" Nicole grumbled.

"I don't know," Riley said. "Where are we going again?"

"I liked him better when he was asleep," Nicole whispered to Sooz.

"Hang on, can you leave a message?" Sooz asked. "Kinda in the middle of something here."

"So, when are you going to admit that you were wrong and I was right?" Mason said to Ilona.

"Never," Ilona replied. "Because if you'll just look ahead, I think you might be pleasantly surprised."

Sure enough, just a small distance deeper into the woods was a cabin waiting for them. Everyone eagerly made their way towards it. Chef was waiting for them outside, and like the other camp, this one was filled with gold rocks.

"What are these all about?" Montana asked.

"I don't know, but they're pretty!" Dirk gushed. "Maybe it's just some fancy new décor."

"Hold everything," Kyle said. "I need to count these rocks, and make sure that the amount to size ratio is perfectly balanced."

"Team Trainwreck," Chef said, "this is your new home, so get used to it. We'll be getting to the challenge later which will explain everything, but for now just enjoy your new home."

Everyone except Kyle entered the cabin.

"Can't you do that on your own time?" Joseph said as he grabbed Kyle and dragged him inside.

The cabin was identical to the Cutthroat cabin, and everyone was just as happy to see beds.

"Okay, good work today everyone," Riley said as he collapsed on a bed. "Wake me when it's tomorrow."

"Um, we still have a challenge," Ilona pointed out.

Riley had already fallen into a deep slumber though.

"I still don't know why he was brought back," Missy scoffed. "Such a waste of space that could have been used for one of the rare good people."

"Well, I for one am ready for the challenge!" Dirk exclaimed. "We are going to, like, totally dominate. Especially with our work horse here."

He gestured at Joseph.

"Uh, I'll do my best," Joseph shrugged.

"You tell'em, tiger," Dirk said as he punched Joseph on the arm playfully.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Ilona-**I think we're off to a pretty good start. No team is going to be perfect, but I think there are a lot of hard workers on this team and we will be able to handle the challenges.

**Mason-**Fine, Ilona wins this round. But I bet I still could have gotten us here faster.

**Joseph-**Dirk is…kinda weirding me out. But I guess he's got the right spirit, so that's something.

* * *

"Attention, campers!" Chris announced through his megaphone. "It is time to begin your first challenge of the season."

Both teams exited their cabins as they listened to Chris.

"You all know the drill," Chris said. "You are playing for immunity, which means the team that loses will be going to the Dock of Shame to vote off one of their own. Now, let's get to the challenge. You may have noticed that there are some colourful rocks speckled over you campgrounds. For this challenge, you will be given a set time to take these rocks and dump them on the other team's side. As you can see, there is a hill dividing your camps, so you'll need to bring the rocks up, and roll them down. When the time's up, the team with the most of their own colour on the other side will win immunity. And size does matter, so the bigger the rock, the more points. Ready…begin!"

"Okay, everyone," Lionel said to Team Cutthroat. "Let's get to this."

With that he started to push against a large green boulder. Steadily it started to move.

"Here, let me help you with that," Stanley said as he started to push against the rock as well.

Misha and Gene had both grabbed medium-sized rocks and were slowly carrying them up the slope. Willow was gathering up pebbles.

"Every little point counts," she remarked.

Donna was trying to grab a small rock but having trouble lifting it.

"Having trouble?" Zola asked.

"I don't see you helping," Donna said as she finally managed to lift the rock with much effort.

Beatrice had set her sights on a huge boulder.

"Okay, time to show everyone what I'm made of!" she exclaimed.

She began pushing against the rock forcefully, but to no avail.

"Yeah, you're not going anywhere," Edward said.

"Just…watch…me," Beatrice.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Lionel-**This first victory is always important. If you can start off on the right foot, then you're setting yourself up for a season of victories.

**Donna-**So, I'm not so great in the physical department. But neither is Zola, and she's the one who's doing all the complaining.

**Beatrice-**Just you watch, I'm going to singlehandedly win this challenge, and then I'll be Miss Popular!

* * *

(Team Trainwreck)

"Alright, everybody," Ilona said. "Try to work in your skill level. Let's all just do what we can."

"On it!" Joseph exclaimed as he started to push against a large boulder.

"Yeah, go Jo, you can do it!" Dirk cheered.

Ilona had picked up a smaller, but still well-sized rock and started to carry.

"Pfft, I can do that," Mason said as he grabbed a slightly larger rock and followed her.

Nicole and Montana with both trying to move a larger boulder.

"Sooz…we could use a little help," Nicole said.

"I'm on the phone," Sooz groaned. "So rude…sorry, Christine, you were saying?"

Kyle was busy scooping up smaller pebbles.

"We can't have everyone going for the big ones," he said. "The small ones matter too."

"Well, I'm not doing anything," Missy pouted. "Because no one asked me nicely."

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Dirk-**Ilona said to help out in our own skillsets, and my skill is moral motivation!

**Missy-**If we lose, these people only have themselves to blame for their own rudeness.

**Mason-**Ilona likes to put on a tough girl show, but she's going to need to do better than that to impress me.

* * *

Both sides were reaching the top of the hill by now. Gene tossed his rock down at the Trainwreck side.

"Ha, score one for us!" he exclaimed.

"Here's one for you too," Ilona said as she tossed her rock over the edge.

"And you can have this one as well," Mason said as he tossed his rock.

"I don't think so," Misha said as she twisted herself to launch her own rock.

It collided with Mason's and knocked them both back onto the trainwreck side.

"Oh…what!?" Mason gasped.

"Don't worry, here comes the heavy cavalry," Ilona said as Joseph arrived with a large boulder.

"Uh-oh," Keith remarked as the boulder was pushed over the edge and sent crashing down to the Cuthroat side. Various of the campers on the incline had to dive out of the way and drop what they were carrying. Lionel and Stanley were still trying to move their own boulder, but it was taking time. Willow and Kyle both reached the top.

"Eat pebbles!" Willow exclaimed as she scattered the rocks.

"Likewise," Kyle said as he also tossed his own pile.

"It's looking neck and neck here," Chris said. "But you've both got time to pull ahead."

"Quick, keep bringing the big stuff," Joseph called to his team.

"We're trying," Nicole grunted as she and Montana pushed the large boulder. "These things are heavy though."

Mason spotted Riley sleeping against a rock, apparently having fallen asleep while pushing it.

"Hey, get up!" Mason shouted as he shook Riley awake. "You've got a job to do here!"

He then turned to face Sooz who was still busy chattering on her phone.

"I'll take that," he said as he grabbed her phone and crushed it in his hands.

"Hey, for all you know I could have been talking to my dying grandmother," Sooz said.

"But you weren't," Mason said. "So get to work!"

Over on Team Cutthroat, things were equally as hectic.

"We need to keep moving, people," Lionel said. "We've got to secure the lead."

"Take this, you dumb boulder!" Beatrice exclaimed. "Hiya!"

She delivered a firm punch, before recoiling in pain.

"Ow!" she cried. "That hurt. I think I need to sit down for a bit."

"Ugh," Edward groaned as he rubbed his head in frustration.

"Maybe we need a new approach," Gene suggested. "What if some of us try to block the others so they can't get by?"

"That might actually work," Donna said. "Worth a shot at least."

Both teams came up to the top of the hill again. Team Trainwreck were mostly carrying smaller rocks, with Joseph bringing up another average sized one. Team Cutthroat was only able to get up a few of their own. But Gene, empty handed, stepped ahead and stood in front of the other team.

"You're going to have to get past me first," Gene said.

"What is this?" Mason scoffed.

"If you want to make me move, you'll have to drop your rock," Gene said.

"I'll deal with this guy," Ilona said as she let her rock roll back down to the bottom.

She then walked up to Gene.

"Look, I don't want to have to use violence," Ilona said.

"Well then today's your unlucky day," Gene said. "Because I happen to know karate."

Gene attempted to take a chop at Ilona, but she used her leg to sweep him off his feet instantly.

"Keep moving, guys," she said to the rest of her team.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Ilona-**There's a difference between 'knowing karate' and actually being able to use it.

**Lionel-**This is not good. We're falling behind!

**Mason-**Despite how useless most of this team is being, we're actually taking the lead.

* * *

"It's getting down to the wire now," Chris announced. "And right now Team Trainwreck has the lead, can we see a shakeup before the time runs up?"

"Things aren't looking so good for us," Stanley sighed as he wiped the sweat off his forehead.

"Yeah, and you know who I blame for this?" Lionel said. "You."

He pointed at Misha.

"Me? What the f**k did I do?" she snarled. "I'm doing all the work here."

"Well, when we lose, you'll be the one taking the fall," Lionel said. "So deal with it."

"Oh…we'll see about that," Misha growled.

She then charged forward. Lionel flinched, assuming she was coming for him, but instead, Misha just grabbed another rock. She sprinted up the hill with it fiercely. She tossed it over and quickly ran back down to the bottom to grab another.

"Well, what are you waiting for? Keep moving!" Misha ordered.

Misha continued to move with newfound ferocity, tossing rock after rock over to the other side. As the time neared its end, she jumped onto the large rock that Beatrice had been attempting to push. Using her legs, she caused it to roll. She directed in away from the hill. She then twisted and caused it to change direction. From her she caused it to roll forward. She targeted a sharp rock in the ground. She gained momentum on the boulder and sent it towards this rock. She then leapt off as the rock was launched into the air off of the incline. It bounded upwards and slammed right at the top of the hill and rolled down the slope, bowling down the other members of the team.

"And that's time!" Chris exclaimed. "We will know tally the scores and see which team will be going to the Dock of Shame first."

Blaineley and Chef made their way along the campsites and counted the amount of rocks. Everyone else just watched on anxiously. The two co-hosts walked up to Chris and whispered the results.

"Okay, we have a conclusion," Chris said. "It was close but the winners are…"

…

…

…

"Team Cutthroat!"

The team cheered in success, while Team Trainwreck sighed in defeat.

"So that does it," Chris said. "Team Cutthroat, congratulations, you will all live to see tomorrow. Team Trainwreck, it's time to let someone go. You have the rest of the day to make your decision, then it's elimination time."

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Misha-**Thank god. I am not going out first just because my team is a bunch of sissy idiots. I don't care if I have to win every single challenge in this game, I will do it.

**Zola-**Okay, so the baddies get to survive one more day out here. But that's just one more day for me to plan my first move.

**Montana-**Well that's a down dang drag. Looks like I'll be saying bye-bye to one of my new friends already, right.

**Nicole-**Hm…that could have gone better. But this just means I've got to turn up the strategy a little sooner.

* * *

(Team Trainwreck)

The team had gathered outside their cabin after their loss.

"Okay, I'm just going to say what I'm thinking," Mason said to everyone. "Ilona needs to go first."

"Me?" Ilona asked.

"Yes, you," Mason said. "You said it yourself, you would take full responsibility if we lost."

"Alright, I'll own up to that," Ilona said. "But I feel like voting for me at this point would be a mistake. I can still help this team, and I promise I will if you keep me around."

"Sorry, I've made up my mind," Mason said. "I suggest the rest of you do the same."

With that Mason left the group and everyone else started to disperse. Ilona just sighed to herself as she walked away.

"Hey, Miss Ilona, wait up!" Montana exclaimed.

"Oh hi," Ilona said.

"I just wanted to say you shouldn't pay no nevermind to what that guy says, right," Montana said. "I for one thought you did a bang up job leading us today."

"Well, thank you," Ilona said. "I hope the others saw that as well."

"I agree," Missy said. "You may be condescending and entitled, but you're far from the worst person here. That would be Mason."

"Hm, he has certainly being doing all he can to stir the pot," Ilona said. "It might be best if we send him home first."

"My thoughts exactly," Missy said.

"So we're agreed," Montana said. "Mason goes home first, right."

As the group of girls talked, Kyle walked by and eyed them curiously, before continuing to walk. Meanwhile, Joseph, Dirk, and Riley were sitting inside the cabin and talking.

"Aw man, this seriously sucks," Dirk sighed. "It's, like, the worst ever."

"Yeah, well, we gotta face facts now," Joseph said. "Someone needs to go home. And we need to make sure we're strengthening the team."

Joseph glanced at Riley who was sleeping on a bed.

"Aw, let's not pick on him," Dirk said. "He seems nice enough. Can't we get rid of someone mean first?"

"Well, there is one other person I can't stand," Joseph said. "Missy. She just stood there during the challenge. She didn't help at all."

"Oh yeah," Dirk agreed. "And she's quite rude too."

"Riley, you down for this?" Joseph asked.

Riley gave a thumbs-up without moving from his spot. Kyle entered the building and spotted the boys, before backing up and leaving. Nicole and Sooz were talking together underneath a tree.

"Okay, so give it to me, what's the vote?" Sooz asked.

"I'm thinking," Nicole said. "We need to consider our best option."

"And that is?" Sooz asked.

"I'm thinking…" Nicole repeated, "…Ilona."

"Any reason why?" Sooz asked.

"She basically volunteered herself if we lost," Nicole said. "It would be a simple vote that would avoid stirring the pot. Besides, Ilona could be a threat down the road, she's going to take charge of this team, and work herself into a secure spot if we don't take her out now."

"Works for me," Sooz said.

"Oh Montana," Nicole called as she spotted the other girl walking by. "Sooz and I were just talking about voting out Ilona tonight."

"What?" Montana said. "Oh no, no, you can't do that."

"But she's a threat," Nicole said. "We need to finish her off now before we let her get far."

"But she's so nice," Montana insisted. "I'd much rather vote out Mason, right."

"I understand where you're coming from," Nicole said, "but we need to play it smart. We aren't playing with amateurs anymore, this is the big time and we need to make sure we stay one step ahead."

"I really don't like this," Montana said. "Please, let's just remove Mason know. We can worry about being smart later."

Kyle walked up to the girls, before backing up and thinking to himself.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Ilona-**I'd like to just remove Mason right now. He's going to be trouble, and I don't want to give him a chance.

**Missy-**My elimination plan is to go from worst to best. Ilona is…ugh, decent…so she stays. Mason on the other hand is pure horrid, he needs to go first.

**Montana-**I never was big on the whole strategy deal, right. I just vote with my heart and that's always worked for me.

**Joseph-**There are a lot of slackers on this team, but Missy is by far the worst. She is an anchor that is holding us down.

**Dirk-**Let's try to keep things civil here. Missy is aggressive and rude, she needs to go first.

**Riley-**I'm just going with the plan. Whatever.

**Nicole-**I'll admit, I have some insecurities about Ilona. She's playing the leader role, and that's a role that I'm used to playing. I can't let myself become her pawn, I am no one's pawn.

**Sooz-**I'm ready to think strategically and all that if it'll help me. I won't be making any huge moves, but I'll be doing what's best for me.

**Mason-**Ilona is going down. I'm not putting up with her any longer.

**Kyle-**Hm, it's seems to me that there are three divisions of three out here, all with different plans of how the vote should go. And that leaves me as the deciding vote. I will take this responsibility very seriously.

* * *

(Dock of Shame)

The ten teens sat on stumps at the beach while Chef stood in front of them.

"Team Trainwreck," he greeted, "you guys sucked."

"Gee, thanks for the update," Nicole remarked.

"Due to your failure, one of you will be going home," Chef said. "And there's no coming back this time, so don't expect anything like that. Now, for you fancy-schmancy prize…"

He revealed a platter full of golden marshmallows.

"The Golden Marshmallow of Safety," Chef said. "I've got nine, there are ten of you. Capiche?"

Everyone just kept looking forward with determination.

"If I give you a marshmallow, you are safe," Chef said. "If you don't receive one, you are out! First marshmallow…"

…

…

…

"Sooz!"

Sooz grabbed her marshmallow while looking at her phone.

"Montana!"

"Kyle!"

"Joseph!"

"Dirk!"

"Nicole!"

"Riley!"

Three people remained. Ilona, Missy, and Mason.

"It comes down to you three," Chef said. "One of you screwed up bad and will be going home."

Mason glared at Ilona who just gave him a glance of her. Missy just grumbled to herself about being in the bottom three.

"The next golden marshmallow," Chef said, "goes to…"

…

…

…

…

…

"Mason!"

This left Ilona and Missy without a marshmallow.

"Wait…what!?" Missy roared. "What is this!? This is so messed up! He's supposed to be going! Why are we in the bottom two!? Who screwed up this vote!?"

"Time for the final marshmallow," Chef said. "And it goes to…"

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

"Missy!"

Ilona just sighed to herself.

"I understand," she said as she stood up.

"Ilona, you have gained the most votes," Chef said, "and you have been eliminated."

"Take care, dears," Ilona said to everyone as she walked along the dock. "Try to get along without me, okay?"

Montana waved goodbye sadly. Missy just gave a deathly glare towards the rest of her team. Mason smiled smugly.

"The rest of you, congratulations on surviving your first elimination," Chef said. "But you're gonna have to try harder if you want to make it in this game. For now, you may head back to your camp."

* * *

**Votes:**

**Ilona-**Sorry, Mason, you're just causing waves and starting conflicts. I can't have that on my team.

**Joseph-**Missy, you are on a team now, and you are far from a team player. You need to go.

**Nicole-**Sorry, Ilona, it's not worth the risk to keep you.

**Mason-**Ilona's shouldn't have messed with me.

**Montana-**I vote for Mason, right. He's nothing but mean.

**Dirk-**Missy, maybe there's a sweet girl in you, but you're not showing her.

**Missy-**Mason, you are nothing but a rancid slime on society. If it were up to me, I would do a lot worse than vote you off.

**Riley-**Um…Missy…I think?

**Sooz-**Ilona, thank you for making yourself into an easy target. Now, ta-ta.

**Kyle-**The decision is between Missy, Mason, or Ilona. Clearly every aspect most be considered, but overall, Ilona got far in her first season, Mason and Missy did not even make merge. For the sake of balance, Ilona must go.

* * *

(Conclusion)

Blaineley, Chris, and Chef all stood on the Dock of Shame together.

"And so we complete our first day," Chris said, "our first challenge, and our first elimination."

"Both teams have clearly got the drive to fight," Chef said. "But which one will take the lead, and who will take the fall?"

"As well, be sure to check in on all the drama," Blaineley said. "Will Donna and Zola's rivalry continue to escalate? How will Missy react to her team? And will Keith be able to work himself into safety, or is he doomed already?"

"We've got plenty more to get to, in this season of titans," Chris said. "So don't miss the next episode of…Total Dram: Return of the Stars!"

_Author's Note: And there we have our first boot of the All-Stars, and it's Ilona! Ilona was one of the last characters I added to the cast. I had a bunch of big ideas for a lot of characters, but I realized that I couldn't have everyone get a big new story, and I would need to bring in some people to be early boots as well. That's where Ilona came in. She went far in Stranded and had a very full story. I felt she would make for a good, not super obvious, first boot, since she had depth, but just didn't have room for a story this time. Check in next time for more ^_^_


	3. I Want To Help You Suck Less

_Author's Note: Hey all, just continuing my alternating patterns between two series, it seems to be working for me so far. Although, as a heads up, once September rolls around I'm going to be crazy busy, so updates will sadly be slowed. But I won't give up and hopefully I'll be able to keep it up ^_^_

Chris, Blaineley, and Chef all stood on the Dock of Shame together.

"Welcome back," Chris exclaimed, "This is Total Drama: Return of the Stars!"

"Last time we kicked everything off," Blaineley said. "Bringing back twenty of the biggest stars…eh, mostly…and dividing them into two teams."

"Tensions rose fast, on both sides," Chef said. "Misha tried to take charge of her team, but Lionel wasn't happy about that. Similarly, Mason wasn't a big fan of Ilona trying to lead their team. Not to mention, Zola and Donna are already on their way to a cat fight."

"In the end, though," Chris said, "Misha managed to get her team the victory, and Team Trainwreck had to vote someone off. There were many different ideas thrown around. Mason and Ilona were both gunning for each other, while Dirk wanted to send Missy home. It was a close vote, but Kyle broke the tie and sent Ilona packing."

"And that was only day one," Blaineley said. "There's plenty more that's gonna unfold soon enough."

"So keep watching," Chef concluded, "Total Drama: Return of the Stars."

(**Theme Song Plays…**)

* * *

(Team Cutthroat)

**Confessional:**

**Beatrice-**It's a brand new day. The start of the dawn of the season of Beatrice! I can't wait to see what today has in store for us.

**Zola-**So far, I've gotten myself in good with Willow and Stanley, two trustworthy people. But Imma need to plan things out for the longterm now, to make sure that ain't nobody gets the drop on me this time.

**Edward-**I'm glad that we didn't have to go to elimination yesterday, it was a good way to kick off this season. However, now I'm ready to start position myself into power on this team.

* * *

"Ah, what a lovely day!" Beatrice exclaimed as she exited the cabin. "Sun is shining, birds are tweeting, it's the perfect day to be on a reality TV show!"

Beatrice spotted Willow walking by on the other side of the cabin and waved at her.

"Hiiii, Bestie!" she exclaimed.

However, before Willow could wave back, she was grabbed by Zola and dragged off.

"Huh…guess she didn't see me," Beatrice shrugged. "Oh well, I've got plenty of other friends I can talk with…"

She glanced around and spotted Edward exiting the cabin.

"Isn't that right, Eddie?!" she asked as she put her arm over his shoulder.

"Uh…good morning," Edward said.

"So, what did you want to do today?" Beatrice asked.

"Uh…'do?'" Edward asked.

"You know, it's like something between friends," Beatrice said. "Or at least I think it is, you'd need to ask someone who actually has some friends!"

Beatrice then started to laugh at her own joke, much to Edward' dismay.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Edward-**Well, this certainly throws a wrench in my plans for the day. How am I supposed to strategize if Beatrice is following me everywhere I go?

* * *

Zola, meanwhile, had gathered up Stanley and Willow and was meeting with them behind the cabin.

"Alright, people," she said, "we're off to a good start. Our first victory, and we all feel like we trust each other now, right?"

"Uh, yeah, sure," Stanley said.

"Whatever you say," Willow added.

"Good, good," Zola said. "But three in ten isn't gonna be winning us any wars, so we need to branch out and expand."

"Well, Beatrice seems nice," Willow said. "Maybe we could bring her in."

"Hm, she seems a little unpredictable," Zola said, "but if you can keep an eye on her, then she could work on our side. As for you…"

She turned to Stanley.

"Yes, ma'am?" Stanley asked.

"You've got an advantage 'cause you're from that Stranded season," Zola said. "So you can follow your friends from that season and make sure they don't pull anything tricky."

"Yeah…here's the thing," Stanley said, "I'm not exactly friendly with the guys on this team."

"Well, suck it up, hun," Zola said. "You're our best connection, and we need to make the most of that."

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Zola-**To be honest, I don't trust any of the other suckers out here. But we just need to keep them in line, and the best way to do that is a little friendly networking.

**Willow-**I'm sure Beatrice would love to be in our alliance, this is going to be just so great. Wolf-pack power, unite!

**Stanley-**There's no way I'm bringing Keith into this alliance, he's way too untrustworthy. And Misha won't let anyone get close to her, let alone talk with her. So I guess I've only got one option left.

* * *

Donna adjusted her hair and dusted off her shirt, before she eyed Lionel who was leaning against the side of the cabin.

"Okay, let's try this again," she said to herself.

She then walked up to Lionel and placed herself against him.

"Hey there," she said. "You're looking very…nice today."

"Yeah, I know," Lionel said without paying much attention to her. "I look nice every day."

"Oh, so true, I'm sure," Donna cooed while tilting Lionel's head to face her. "You know, I think you might just be my type."

"Again, I know," Lionel said. "I'm every girl's type."

"Well, aren't you special," Donna grumbled to herself.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Donna-**Well, this is going smoothly (rolls eyes.)

**Lionel-**I've got girls crawling over me back home. Donna, she's cute I guess, but nothing special.

* * *

(Team Trainwreck)

Montana walked sadly along the forest, with Missy following behind her.

"I can't believe that Ilona is gone," Montana sighed. "Why would people vote for her, right?"

"Well, I can believe it," Missy remarked. "Face it, these people are just sneaky liars and we got shafted into the minority."

"Oh no, that can't be it," Montana said. "I'm sure there's a logical explanation, right."

"Don't bet on it," Missy said. "These people aren't your friends, they're your enemies."

"Well, let's just see about that, right," Montana said. "I'll ask Nicole right now."

Montana spotted Nicole and walked up to her.

"Hi there, Nicole," Montana said.

"Oh, hello, Montana," Nicole said.

"I just wanted to ask you," Montana said, "yesterday you told me that Ilona wanted to go…so did you vote for her?"

"I'm afraid I did," Nicole replied. "I'm sorry, Montana, but I felt it was the best move."

"But why?" Montana asked. "She was so nice."

"We can't afford to think about just what's the nicest thing to do," Nicole replied. "This is a harsh game for a big prize. Every move counts, and I just felt that Ilona was too much of a threat to keep in the game any longer. Trust me, it's all for the best, for both of us."

"Okay," Montana sighed as she turned to leave.

"Well?" Missy asked. "What'd I tell you?"

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Missy-**Montana needs a wakeup call. She can't keep pretending these people are her friends, because every single one of them would stab her in the back. I'm the only person she can trust.

**Montana-**I understand that it's all a game, right, but I just don't think we need to be making sacrifices like that for the sake of strategy. If you ask me, even if it was a risk, Ilona deserves to be here over Mason, right.

**Nicole-**Montana doesn't quite fully grasp the entire strategy concept of the game. She had an easy run on her first season, but we're playing with serious competitors now. I can't let myself get caught off guard by anything.

* * *

(Team Cutthroat)

Gene was sitting by himself on a rock surrounded by trees as he eyed the other teammates walking about the clearing.

"Hm, this should be easy enough," he said to himself. "I just need to know where to strike first."

"Oof," someone exclaimed behind them.

He turned around to see Keith had dropped down from a tree.

"Hi there!" Keith exclaimed brightly.

"Hello," Gene said coldly. "Do you want something?"

"You know, you kinda suck," Keith said nonchalantly.

"I—What are you talking about?" Gene replied.

"I'm just saying, I saw your first season…and yeah, you sucked," Keith said. "I mean, it's one thing to be in a bad position, but you had complete control and blew it all so that you fell straight to the bottom. Real professional of you."

"Hmph, you don't know what you're talking about," Gene said. "I was a chessmaster. I did get myself to the end."

"Ha, it sounds funny when you say it that way," Keith said. "Seeing as you didn't even do anything to get to the end. You were carried there because no one else saw you as a threat. You could have been eliminated at any time."

"How do you know that wasn't just all part of my plan," Gene replied defensively.

"Okay, okay, I'm willing to give up the benefit of the doubt," Keith said. "Since you did get the two weakest guys to the end with you…but oh wait, they both beat you. Yep, fail from start to finish."

"Look, do you want something?!" Gene snapped. "Or are you just here to mock me?"

"Nah, I want to help you suck less," Keith said. "It's a longshot, but there's still hope for you."

"I don't need any help from you," Gene replied.

"Okay then, have fun losing in an epic fashion again," Keith replied.

"But…" Gene said, "I wouldn't mind an alliance between us…perhaps we can both help each other out."

"Okay," Keith shrugged. "If you'd feel more secure describing it that way."

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Gene-**Keith thinks he's so smart, well, we'll see who's laughing when I backstab him and send him on his way. I'll make the most of him for now, but he's in for a rude awakening.

**Keith-**Ha, Gene's a lot of fun. I can't wait to see his face when I backstab him. But I'll give him a little false hope and let him feel safe for now.

* * *

Edward was trying to lose Beatrice, but she continued to follow him every step of the way.

"Where are we going?" she asked. "You seem to just be walking in circles."

"Are you sure you don't have anything better you should be doing?" Edward asked.

"What? Something better than my pal, Eddie?" Beatrice laughed. "Of course not."

Edward grumbled to himself and clenched his fists.

"Hey, you feeling alright?" Beatrice asked.

"Beatrice, I didn't want it to come to this, but you've left me no choice," Edward said with annoyance. "…How would you like to be in an alliance with me?"

"Are you kidding, I'd love it!" Beatrice exclaimed as she hugged Edward.

"Yes, now you see…" Edward said. "This needs to be a secret alliance…so it wouldn't be good if we were seen together."

"Oooooh, got it!" Beatrice exclaimed. "You can count on me!"

"Good," Edward sighed in relief.

"Oh, I just had the best idea ever," Beatrice exclaimed. "We should invite Willow into this alliance. I'm sure she'd love it."

"Yeah, sure, why not," Edward said. "Just go."

Beatrice skipped away and soon ran into Willow again.

"Hey, Bestie!" Willow exclaimed.

"Hey!" Beatrice replied. "Guess what? We're in an alliance with Edward now."

"Oh, is that so?" Willow asked. "Well, I—wait, his name's Edward!?"

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Edward-**Sometimes you've just got to roll with the punches. If Beatrice wants to be my friend…so be it, I'll work that to my advantage. I don't like it, but I need to do something about her.

**Beatrice-**This is so exciting! An alliance of all my best pals out here! We're gonna run this show!

**Willow-**Hm, it's only day two, and already I feel like Bella being torn by two sides. My wolf pack on one, and my sweet Edward on the other.

* * *

"Anyways," Donna said, "I really think you and I would go good together…hint, hint."

"Maybe," Lionel shrugged. "But I think some of the other girls might have something to say about that too."

Donna looked ready to just storm off, but Stanley showed up between them.

"Hey, sorry, am I interrupting something?" Stanley asked.

"Not really," Lionel remarked. "Just your average fangirl."

Lionel left the two alone.

"Fangirl?" Stanley

asked. "I never got that kind of vibe from you."

"Yeah, well people are deep," Donna said. "They can always surprise you."

"Now, that's true," Stanley remarked. "So, you're having a rough day?"

"Just a slow start," Donna replied. "People don't exactly seem to be warming up to me."

"Can't really blame them, can you?" Stanley said. "I may have never actually met you last season, but I know that you played a pretty manipulative game."

"Oh please, I played smart," Donna replied. "People are just bitter because I outsmarted them. I did what I had to to get ahead."

"And I take it you're willing to do it again," Stanley said. "Which might be why people aren't exactly lining up to be your best friend."

"We're all here to play," Donna said. "And I've got nothing to hide this time."

"Well, good luck to you," Stanley said. "I'm sure you'll be able to pull something off."

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Donna-**Yeah, I played a harsh game last time, but this is Team Cutthroat, hello, it's in the name, that's what we're here for. I deserve just as much of a chance as everyone out here.

**Stanley-**I don't think Donna will be much of a threat to Zola. If she's telling the truth, then she's got no power. So, I'll keep an eye on her, but I'm being careful. I know enough about her to know not to underestimate her.

* * *

(Team Trainwreck)

Dirk, Joseph, and Riley were all sitting in cabin together. Well, Joseph was sitting; Dirk was hanging upside down off a bed, and Riley was lying comfortably still asleep.

"So…last night…was a little strange," Dirk remarked. "I thought for sure Missy would be leaving. Like, what happened?"

"Hm, I'm not sure," Joseph said. "But it's got me worried. If there are alliances forming already that we don't know about then we could be in trouble soon."

"Oh, that would so totally suck," Dirk remarked. "Maybe it's, like, an alliance between Mason and Missy. You know, like the two most meanest people on the team."

"It's possible," Joseph said.

"Hey, here's a super kickin' idea," Dirk said. "The three of us should align. Wouldn't that be great? I mean, like, we'd all be working together and keeping each other safe."

"Hm," Joseph said, "it could work."

"Riley, you in?" Dirk asked.

Riley gave a thumbs up.

"So, we're good!" Dirk exclaimed.

"Now, we just need to figure out where everyone else stands," Joseph said.

"I can field that," Kyle said as he entered the room. "I made sure to have all my facts straight yesterday so that I could make the most unbiased decision. As it stands, Nicole and Sooz are working together and voted with Mason, Nicole wants to work with Montana, however, Montana is sticking with Missy. As for me, I voted with Nicole, Sooz, and Mason, but only in the interest of balance."

"Wow," Joseph remarked, "you really…put a lot of thought into that."

"So, Kyle," Dirk said, "how you would you like to join our alliance? There's always room for more."

"Ha, what do you take me for? Some sort of Lord of Chaos?" Kyle scoffed. "Absolutely not. Your alliance is already grossly overborn with males, and if I were to join the balance would only be thrown off further. Besides, seeing as female left last time, it's only fitting that a male needs to leave next."

"So, you're threatening us now?" Jospeph asked.

"I am stating the facts as they are," Kyle said. "I wish you no ill-will, only to keep the balance intact."

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Joseph-**Ideally I would like to keep the strong in…but I've also realized that loyalty is just as important, and right now Dirk seems like a really loyal friend. I think I'll need to stay close to him.

**Dirk-**Eee, alliances in action now, this is getting, like, so exciting!

**Riley-**So…I'm in an alliance now…okay works for me. They'll tell me how to vote and I'll just do what they say and let them carry me to the end.

* * *

"Well, I'm not sure if we can count on Montana," Nicole remarked to Sooz.

"Uh-huh," Sooz said as she kept her eyes glued to her phone.

"I want to include her," Nicole said, "but she's a very emotional player, and that could be risky."

"Oh yeah…that…" Sooz said, not paying much attention.

"Luckily, I've got a backup plan," Nicole said. "Come with me."

The two girls walked over to where Mason was leaning against a tree.

"Hello," Nicole said to him.

"What do you want?" Mason asked.

"I want to talk business," Nicole said. "Last night, we helped you out."

"Really?" Mason asked skeptically.

"That's right," Nicole said. "People wanted you gone, but instead we made sure that it was Ilona."

"And what's her deal?" Mason asked as he gestured at Sooz who was still texting.

"I helped," Sooz said without looking up.

"Well, what do you want, a thank you card?" Mason asked.

"I want an alliance," Nicole said. "We're in this together now, so we need to work together."

"Alright, look, this is how it's going to work," Mason said as he stepped in close to Nicole and placed his arms on her shoulders. "You want to be on my side, fine. You're going to do exactly what I say and vote for exactly who I tell you to."

"You don't scare me," Nicole said as she met his gaze fiercely.

Mason returned the stare and tightened his grip around Nicole's shoulders.

"That's my deal," Mason said releasing Nicole. "Now get lost."

Nicole turned to leave, but Sooz was still entranced with her device.

"I said beat it," Mason ordered.

"Huh?" Sooz said looking up. "Did you say something to me?"

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Nicole-**Working with Mason is my best bet right now. He's already alienated himself from everyone else, so whether he realizes it or not, he needs me.

**Mason-**Those girls don't seem like much, but maybe they'll surprise me. What matters though, is that I just keep them under my thumb.

**Sooz-**So apparently we're working with Mason now…or we're voting him out next…I dunno, I kinda phased for a bit.

* * *

(Later)

The two teams stepped up to a beach where Chris was waiting for them.

"Greetings, campers," Chris exclaimed. "So, are you ready for another challenge?"

"Are we ever!" Dirk exclaimed.

"Let's not lose this time," Nicole added.

"Ha, we can take them," Lionel scoffed.

"Well, last time we kicked things off strongly with our first elimination, and as you can see, Ilona has bitten the dust," Chris said. "But for today, we'd like to give you a little break and give the rest of you a chance to get settled."

"Lame," Misha groaned. "Get to the part where people get voted out."

"Not today," Chris said. "First order of business, you guys must be getting hungry…"

"Did someone say food!?" Riley exclaimed as he suddenly snapped out of his stupor.

"Actually no, I said 'hungry,'" Chris said.

"I am hungry," Riley said with a nod. "Where's the food?"

"Just bring it in," Chris sighed as he waved to someone.

Chef came up carrying a large crate. He dropped it and grunted. Blaineley followed, struggling to carry an identical crate.

"This is…not why I…agreed to," she grumbled as she set the grate down.

"Here you go, guys, breakfast," Chris said as he slowly opened a crate, "dig in…."

Everyone glanced over with interest.

"…straight from Chef's kitchen," Chris said as he revealed various gross food products.

Everything was some hint of grey, and lacked much form. It was mostly just grey goop, stuck in a state between solid and liquid.

"Ew, what is this?" Donna asked as poked a lump cautiously.

"This is what you'll be eating for your stay," Chris said. "So get used to it."

Riley licked some of the goop casually.

"Not bad," he declared.

"Somehow, I doubt his judgment," Stanley remarked.

Eventually, everyone gave into hunger though, and ate some of the strange substance.

"So, how was it?" Chris asked.

"Disgusting," Zola spat. "It gets zero stars outta one hundred—no one thousand."

"Well, here's the deal," Chris said. "Tonight, for dinner, you can have some of that again…or you can win the challenge and get a full-course meal worthy of the gods."

"Ooooh," Willow exclaimed. "I like the sound of that."

"So, win today's challenge and you'll get one last taste of the good life before living off slop," Chris said. "Now, onto today's challenge…"

Chef and Blaineley went out of sight again and returned with a table with eight clay totems on it. Two were purple, two were green, two were yellow, and two were red.

"Each team will be getting one of these, each a different colour," Chris said. "Your job is to both protect your own, while trying to destroy your opponents'. As you can guess, they are very fragile, so they will be broken easily if you're not careful."

"One more thing," Blaineley said, "for this challenge you'll be competing in groups. Mostly it'll be two people per totem, with one trio for one of them. So that means that Team Cutthroat will be sitting someone out."

Everyone fixed their gaze on Beatrice.

"Ooh, I know," Beatrice exclaimed. "We'll sit out Misha! Cause she did so much last time, we should keep it balanced!"

Nearly everyone facepalmed.

"Are you f**king kidding me," Misha snapped. "Well, so much for our victory today. Hope you guys like slop."

"Misha, you will be sitting this challenge out," Chef said. "Now, let's get the rest of you into groups. The team who destroyed the most totems by the end wins the meal for tonight."

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Riley-**Winning a dinner would be nice…but I'm not sure if it's worth the effort, I'm fine with slop too.

**Joseph-**Time to claim our first victory of the season. Let's show them what we've really got.

**Misha-**I'm the only one keeping this team afloat. Just look at who they've got on the other team: Joseph, Mason, even Montana's not bad. Beatrice is just lucky this wasn't immunity or she would be dead meat!

**Lionel-**Well, looks like it's time for me to step up and show my team what I'm worth.

**Donna-**Back on Stranded we had to forage for our own food, and I would much rather be doing that than eating this crap. If only I knew how to fish.

* * *

(Purple Totem)

The totems had been moved to the forest and set up on two separate pedestals. The totems were both in view of each other, but there was enough distance between them that it would require some movement to get to the other side. From Team Cutthroat Keith and Beatrice had been put into a duo, from Team Trainwreck Dirk and Missy had been put together.

"Okay, let's just go about this carefully," Dirk said.

"Oh, just look at that Keith rat, I hate him so much," Missy growled.

"Uh, are you okay?" Dirk asked.

"How can anyone be okay when that monstrosity is on the loose?" Missy replied. "Let me at him, I'll give him the punishment he deserves!"

Meanwhile, Keith and Beatrice were talking.

"Just make sure you keep the totem safe," Keith said. "I'll go for theirs."

"Got it!" Beatrice exclaimed.

Keith scampered up a tree and began to swing his way between them. Missy and Dirk made their way towards the other totem. However, Missy soon set her sights on Keith.

"I will get you!" she exclaimed. "You shall pay for your sins!"

"Have to catch me first!" Keith said playfully.

However, Missy had soon caught him by the ponytail.

"Uh…could have thought that out better," Keith remarked.

"Now feel my wrath!" Missy exclaimed as she slammed Keith against the tree.

She was relentless in her attack.

"Um, Missy, don't you think you're being just a little harsh?" Dirk said. "You don't want to kill him."

"You don't know what I want!" Missy exclaimed. "You can never be too hard on a monster like this, he's escaped his just desserts for too long."

"Don't worry, Keithy, I'll save you from the crazy lady," Beatrice said as she hopped over towards the conflict. "Take this!"

She attempted to punch Missy, but the other girl held Keith up like a shield. Beatrice ended up hitting Keith in the nose.

"Just…get back to…what you were doing," Keith said woozily.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Keith-**Yeah…that Missy girl…has some…issues.

**Missy-**No one on Keith's original season was worthy of serving him justice. But now that I'm here, he's going to finally pay!

**Dirk-**Wow, like, I'm suddenly a little worried about my team.

* * *

(Green Totem)

The green totems had been set up in a rocky terrain. Dust and stones covered the arid ground. Selected from Team Cutthroat were Edward and Willow, selected from Team Trainwreck were Kyle and Montana.

"So, you're names Edward, eh?" Willow asked as she stared at Edward with wide-eyes.

"That's…right," Edward said a little uneasily.

"Do you sparkle, Edward?" Willow asked in awe.

"Um, let's just focus on the challenge," Edward said.

"Whatever you say, Edward," Willow replied.

"So, Kyle, what's the plan?" Montana asked.

"First off, I cannot work in an environment like this," Kyle said. "These stones are all over the place. What is this?!"

"Uh, the wild?" Montana asked.

"Precisely," Kyle said. "I much prefer to think of it as 'the tame.' And it will be one day if we all do our part."

"And that would be?" Montana asked.

"Sorting each and every one of these rocks and arranging them in order of size," Kyle said.

"Sounds…like a blast, right," Montana said. "But I don't think we exactly have time for this."

"Bah, what are you talking about, we're wasting our lives every time we're not organizing rocks," Kyle said. "Now get down here and help me."

Kyle quickly got to the ground and started to move the rocks.

"Sorry, I don't think our team would be very happy if we just gave up on the challenge like that," Montana said.

Edward and Willow were both approaching now.

"Take it out, Willow," Edward ordered.

"Yes sir, Edward!" Willow exclaimed as she charged forward.

"Hold it!" Montana exclaimed as she reached behind her and revealed a boomerang. "Boomerang power!"

She tossed the boomerang straight at Willow.

"Yikes!" Willow exclaimed as she cowered.

The weapon, however, stopped just short of hitting Willow and returned to Montana.

"That was just a warning shot, right," Montana said. "Take one step closer and it'll hit you."

"Eek, what do we do, Edward?" Willow exclaimed.

Edward just sighed to himself.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Edward-**Willow is quite the oddity…but at least she likes me and doesn't hate me. Crazy girls could actually be quite useful if they did exactly what I say.

**Kyle-**I don't have time for challenges when there's work to be done. Although, if you had read my lengthy and detailed letter about my requirements for returning, I specifically noted on the third line of the fifth paragraph on the second page that I wanted all rocks to be prearranged ready for my inspection by the time I arrived. I am quite disappointed.

**Willow-**I can't help myself, his name is Edward…isn't it just beautiful? Edward…I can't think of anything else now.

* * *

(Yellow Totem)

The yellow totems had been set up differently than the others. They had been put on rafts and floated out into the lake. Two members of each team sat on raft. Stanley and Zola were on one, while Joseph and Nicole were on another.

"Looks like we'll have to swim," Joseph noted.

"Well…that doesn't sound fun," Nicole remarked.

"Have you got better idea?" Joseph asked.

"Sadly, no," Nicole said. "Still, I'm not the strongest swimmer, so I'm counting on you here."

Over on the other side, Stanley and Zola were also examining their circumstances.

"I ain't going in there," Zola said. "I ain't gonna get my clothes wet for no reason. They could get ruined, and this stuff cost me a fortune."

"Uh, then why did you wear it out here?" Stanley asked.

"We're on TV, dummy," Zola said. "I ain't gonna show myself on television wearin' some second rate piece of fashion."

"Okay then," Stanley said, "you can just stay here and keep the totem safe. I'll go after theirs."

"Works for me," Zola said.

Stanley jumped into the water and started to swim. Joseph and Nicole were also leaping into the water and swimming towards the other raft. Nicole, true to her word, was having much difficulty trying to keep up and was being swept by the current. She struggled to keep herself moving.

"How you doing?" Joseph asked.

"Just…peachy…" Nicole said.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Zola-**Yeah, I knew that coming out to this here show again wouldn't be no picnic, but at the same time, I've got to maintain some of my class.

**Joseph-**It feels good to know that you're a valuable asset to your team, but at the same time, having weak people on your team is never good because you need all the strength you can get to win challenges.

**Nicole-**Sure, I'm not the strongest which is why I don't care for physical challenges, but the mind if very important out here too and a lot of people forget that.

* * *

(Red Totem)

The red totems had been set up in a special location on the other side of the mountain. The terrain had been turned into a simulated artic full of snow. From Team Trainwreck, Mason, Sooz, and Riley stood on one side. From Team Cutthroat, Donna, Lionel, and Gene stood on the other side.

"Okay, we're going to need a plan," Mason said to his partners.

"Gimme a sec, I'm on the phone," Sooz said.

"We don't have a sec," Mason said. "We need to go now!"

"Yeah…uh-huh…that's nice," Sooz said as she talked into her phone.

"Give me that," Mason said as he tried to grab the phone out of her hand.

Sooz just stepped aside and shoved Mason away from her.

"Looks like it's just the two of us," Mason said as he turned to Riley.

Riley was getting curled up on in the snow.

"Wow, this stuff is cold," he remarked. "How am I supposed to get comfortable now?"

"You're not, we have a challenge to win," Mason said.

"No, I can manage," Riley said as he closed his eyes and went to sleep.

"Hey, get up," Mason said as he kicked him in the ribs.

Riley was able to sleep through it, though.

"Fine, I can handle this challenge all on my own," Mason growled.

Over on the other side, the others were also planning their tactics.

"Just leave this to me," Lionel said. "I can take them."

"Yeah that's great, except we actually want to win," Gene said.

"Uh guys, can we talk a little faster?" Donna asked as she pointed outwards.

Everyone turned to see Mason already coming towards them.

"I'll deal with him," Lionel said as he charged forward.

"Outta my way!" Mason barked.

"Make me," Lionel retorted.

Mason grabbed Lionel and started to struggle with him. Lionel fought back, though and was able to force Mason to the ground. The two boys rolled in the snow together as they fought with each other.

"Well, that takes care of that," Gene remarked. "Now to finish this challenge off."

Gene started to walk up to the other team's totem, while Sooz and Riley were completely oblivious to him.

"L-look, Brad, I w-want that paper done by…w-what do you mean why am I sh-shivering? It's cold!" Sooz said into her phone. "I told you, I'm on a tropical island…and it's cold because of the snow! Oh, you don't believe me? Fine, I'm putting you on video."

Sooz pressed a few button on her phone and held it up.

"See? Snow!" she exclaimed. "What do you mean, there's a creepy guy sneaking up behind me!?"

Sooz twirled around to see Gene approaching her and the totem.

"Back off!" she exclaimed as she kicked Gene between his legs. "It's rude to creep up in people when they're trying to have a conversation."

Gene fell to the ground in pain.

"Well, looks like it's up to me then," Donna remarked.

She started to run across the snowy ground, however, she slipped on ice and ended up falling right on her back.

"Or not," she sighed.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Mason-**Why did you have to stick me with the two most useless people ever?

**Riley-**Snow is hard to sleep on, it's so cold all the time…oh well, I can manage.

**Donna-**I'd really like to actually bring something to this team when it comes to challenges. I don't need to give them another reason to turn on me when it comes time to vote.

* * *

(Purple Totem)

Keith had managed to break free of Missy and had quickly scampered away.

"Get back here, you coward!" Missy exclaimed. "You can't run from me!"

"I'm pretty sure I can, and I will," Keith replied. "You haven't left me many options."

"Grr, I'm not done extracting my revenge on you!" Missy exclaimed as Keith dived behind tree to avoid her grasp.

"Revenge? What did I ever do to you?" Keith said as he grabbed a branch and pulled himself out of the way.

"Revenge by proxy," Missy said. "I'm here to get revenge for everyone who was too dumb to get it themselves."

"Okay, that totally makes sense," Keith said sarcastically while jumping out of the way again.

Suddenly, the branch snapped and Keith fell to the ground.

"Aha, now I've got you!" Missy exclaimed.

She lunged at Keith, but found herself held back.

"Don't worry, Keithy, I've got her!" Beatrice exclaimed as she grabbed Missy by her ponytail.

"But who's guarding the totem!?" Keith pointed out.

"Uh-oh," Beatrice remarked as she turned around to see Dirk sneaking towards their totem.

Beatrice released Missy and dived at Dirk. She tackled into him and knocked him to the ground.

"Ha, Beatrice saves the day!" she exclaimed proudly.

"Ahem," Dirk said as he pointed to the totem which she had knocked to the ground when she collided with him; it had shattered.

"Oh…dang," Beatrice sighed.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Keith-**Well, we lost, but at least I can get away from the psycho for another day.

**Missy-**This isn't over Keith, I will have my true revenge on you! No one is safe!

**Beatrice-**I sure hope I'm not blamed for this somehow.

* * *

(Green Totem)

Montana stared at Edward and Willow; an invisible line divided the two groups. Kyle was still busy sorting rocks and had a long way to go.

"What do we do?" Willow asked Edward.

"She can't stop both of us," Edward said. "There's two of us and one of her."

"Right," Willow said, still not sound certain.

"What are you waiting for?" Edward said. "Go."

"If you say so, Edward," Willow said before charging forward.

Montana instantly tackled her to the ground.

"Not gonna happen," she said.

Edward took this chance to run for the totem.

"Nope!" Montana exclaimed as she rolled over to him and grabbed him by the ankles.

Edward fell to the ground before he could reach his target. Montana held him down, but Willow had gotten up by now and was also approaching the totem. Montana stretched herself out so that her legs were holding Edward down, and so she could grab Willow with her arms.

"You know…" she said to Kyle, "it wouldn't hurt to give me a hand."

"Yes it would," Kyle replied. "It would hurt my purpose to waste time like that."

"I see," Montana replied.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Edward-**Seems like this is the same Montana I remember, she's quite the wild girl. But she's not unbeatable, I'm sure we'll get the best of her soon enough.

**Montana-**Kyle isn't exactly the most helpful teammate, right…but he seems passionate about what he does, so…good for him.

* * *

(Yellow Totem)

Stanley and Joseph were both swimming through the lake, closing in on each other.

"Well, fancy meeting you here," Stanley remarked as the two boys came face to face.

"I don't have time for you," Joseph said. "Out of the way."

"You'll have to make me move," Stanley replied. "Should be fun, eh. Just like the old times."

"I'll show you fun," Joseph said as he grabbed Stanley and pulled him underwater with him.

Nicole, meanwhile, was still struggling to keep up. She fought against the current as she tried to make her way to the other boat. From the raft, Zola was trying to watch the struggle going on underwater.

"Uh, yeah, Stanley, you show him who's boss!" she exclaimed as the two boys fought.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Stanley-**Joseph may have changed since last season, but I bet some things are still the same. If I can get under his skin, I can catch him off guard.

**Joseph-**I remember Stanley well from last season. He was a freak who would not leave me alone. I am so glad we're not on the same team this time.

* * *

(Red Totem)

Mason and Lionel were still in heavy conflict. The two boys rolled through the snow together. Mason grabbed a handful of ice and threw it into Lionel's face. Lionel cringed and Mason was able to kick him in the chest and knock him backwards. Lionel was able to recover though, and tackled Mason back into the ground before he could reach the totem.

Meanwhile, Gene had gotten up and was slowly making his way to the totem again. Sooz was busy distracted by her phone and didn't see him moving now.

"Aha, now I've got it," Gene exclaimed.

However, he didn't see Riley lying in the snow, and ended up tripping over him as the boy rolled over. Gene slammed face first to the ground. Riley then rolled over again and crushed Gene beneath his weight.

Mason, by this time, was able to throw Lionel down into the ground and keep him down this time. He bolted for the other team's totem. However, before he could reach it, Donna formed a snowball and tossed it at the Trainwreck totem. The snowball connected and knocked the totem to the ground. It shattered instantly.

"Grr," Mason growled as he kicked snow into Lionel's face with frustration.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Donna-**Score! I hope people saw that.

**Mason-**I blame my pathetic teammates for that.

* * *

(Green Totem)

"It's down to just two left," Chef said. "With each team scoring one point. This is gonna be close."

Chef looked down at the rocky terrain where the struggle was ensuing. Montana was still having trouble trying to hold both Willow and Edward. Willow was starting to wiggle out of her clutches.

"Just a…little further…" she said as she squeezed herself forward.

Willow finally broke free and ran for the totem.

"Uh-oh," Montana exclaimed.

Montana let go of Edward and immediately charged for the other team's totem. She pulled out her boomerang and tossed it.

"Got it!" Willow exclaimed as she picked up the totem.

She made to throw it on the ground, but just before it shattered, Montana's boomerang hit the other totem.

"And by a split-second, Team Trainwreck gain their second point," Chef announced.

"Alright, that's what I'm talking about, right!" Montana exclaimed.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Edward-**Fine, Montana wins this round. I won't be underestimating her though.

**Kyle-**What? We can't end the challenge now! I've barely begun sorting. How can you people be so selfish?

* * *

(Yellow Totem)

"As it stands right now, Team Cutthroat has one point while Team Trainwreck has two," Blaineley announced from the beach. "If Team Trainwreck wins this point, they will win the reward, if Team Cutthroat wins, then we'll be going to a tiebreaker round. Let's watch."

Joseph and Stanley continued to wrestle in the water. The boys had come up for air, but both were still locked in combat. Joseph had both his arms around Stanley and was trying to get rid of him, but Stanley was putting up a fight too, clinging to Joseph's clothes wherever he could.

"Come on, finish him already!" Zola shouted from the sides. "Give him a smack to the jaw!"

"I don't see you…helping," Stanley retorted while spitting out water.

While this was going on, Nicole had finally managed to swim to Zola's raft. She was underwater now, but she pulled herself up and onto the raft.

"Hold it!" Zola exclaimed as she spotted the girl. "You ain't getting anywhere near it."

Nicole just coughed up water as she dropped to the ground.

"Just…give me…a second," she coughed.

Once Nicole had caught her breath she lunged forward. Zola tried to block her and the two girls collided. As they bumped into the totem it titled…it wobbled…

…

…

…

…

And it fell.

"Team Trainwreck wins reward!" Blaineley exclaimed.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Nicole-**Can't believe…that actually…paid off.

**Stanley-**Well, I tried my best; but Zola had better hope she can do better than that next time, or else she might wind up in trouble.

* * *

Everyone had returned to the beach by now. Most of them had something to show from their experiences in the challenge. Keith was bruised, Willow and Edward were covered in dirt, Joseph, Stanley, and Nicole were dripping wet, and Riley, Gene, Donna, Mason, and Lionel were all coated in melting snow.

"Well, wasn't that a fun challenge?" Chris said. "Team Trainwreck, congratulations on pulling off your first victory of the season, you'll be eating nicely tonight. Team Cutthroat, your luck has run out for today. You guys get nothing."

"You may all head back to camps now," Blaineley said.

"No eliminations tonight," Chef added. "But rest up because tomorrow is another story."

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Misha-**I could've won this challenge easily if they had just let me in. Unbelievable.

**Joseph-**Ha, now we're doing it. I'm on a roll now and I'm not going to back down now!

**Mason-**Wow, can't believe the others came through. The other team must seriously suck.

**Donna-**Well, at least no one can blame me for this.

* * *

(Team Cutthroat)

The team ate their grey sludge unhappily. Angry eyes dartied from side to side. Eventually Misha snapped.

"This is all you fault!" she shouted as she jabbed a fist at Beatrice.

"Me? But what did I do?" Beatrice asked innocently.

"Ugh, what are you, retarded!?" Misha spat. "If you hadn't sat me out, I could have f**king dominated the challenge!"

"Well, that's not my fault!" Beatrice exclaimed defensively. "If you knew how much we needed you then you shouldn't have sat out."

"How does that—ugh, how can you be so f**king stupid!?" Misha shouted.

"How can you be so…um…mean!?" Beatrice shot back.

"Ladies, please, let's just stay calm," Stanley said.

"No, shut up!" Misha spat at Stanley. "This brat needs to understand that she is f**king useless! No she is worse than useless, she is holding us all down and as soon as she blows the next challenge, she had better be f**king gone!"

"No, you're the one who needs to shut up!" Lionel said as he stood up. "I don't care how valuable you think you are, if this is how you're going to react to every loss then you're the one who needs to go!"

"Ha…hahhaha!" Misha laughed bitterly. "Are you insane!? How will any of you hope to survive without me? If you vote me out I swear, each and every one of you will follow."

"Maybe we should…call it quits on mealtime?" Willow suggested.

"Agreed," Gene said.

Everyone immediately got up and went in their separate directions.

"Well…that was awkward," Stanley sighed to Zola.

"Oh believe me, hun, that's just the tip of the iceberg," Zola said. "This is why we need to get rid of them drama-starters post haste. We're just gonna keep on having outbursts like this if we let them stay."

"I know what you mean," Stanley said. "My old team could get pretty crazy at times too."

"Say, where's Willow?" Zola asked.

"I think she's hanging out with her new…friend," Stanley said as he pointed to Willow who was following Edward loyally.

Beatrice joined the group as they walked.

"Hm, I don't like it," Zola said. "That Edward guy has snake eyes. He's gonna be trouble, I'd bet my wig collection on it. And Beatrice…sure she seems sweet, but she's a wildcard."

"Well, let's have faith in Willow," Stanley said. "Like you said, you wanted us to keep an eye on everyone."

"True," Zola said. "Speaking of which, how's that going with your old pals?"

"Not my pals," Stanley said, "but they're harmless from what I can gather. Donna isn't making any allies, and no one wants to get close to Keith."

"Hm, that's good to hear," Zola said.

"That's not to say that we can let our guard down, though," Stanley said. "They're both very devious, and if we let them, they could sneak by."

"Trust me, darlin', I ain't ever letting my guard down out here," Zola said.

Meanwhile, Edward was having a discussion with Beatrice and Willow.

"So, it sounds to me like we're in an alliance now, ladies," Edward said.

"Works for me, Edward," Willow said.

"You guys don't think I'm useless, do you?" Beatrice asked. "Because real friends don't think things like that about each other. And if they do, then I'm making a new rule that says they can't."

"Don't worry, I'd never think something like that about my bestie," Willow said.

"Thanks," Beatrice beamed. "Eddie?"

"Uh...yeah…I'm sure you have a use…for something," Edward said.

"Aw, I love you guys!" Beatrice exclaimed.

Over in the woods, Gene had spotted Keith sitting in a tree.

"Hey, get down here," Gene said. "I want to talk strategy."

"Wow, is that all you do?" Keith said as he hung himself upside down to be eye to eye with Gene. "That's gotta get a little boring, don't you think?"

"No, I don't," Gene replied.

"Okay then, here's my strategy tip for the day," Keith said. "Try not to get voted out."

"Well, obviously," Gene scoffed.

"Great, you're keeping you nicely," Keith said as he sprung back up the tree. "Night!"

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Misha-**I'm not wasting any time with pleasantries this time. I'm laying out exactly how it is and if people can't handle that then f**k them.

**Beatrice-**Misha has, like, a lot of problems. I think she needs anger management or something, she has no control on her emotions.

**Zola-**Misha is trouble, mark my words. She's the first one on my hit list.

**Stanley-**I definitely don't want to put up with Misha, but at the same time…she does have a point. With the way the teams are stacked, we really do need a physical force on our team.

**Edward-**I may not like this alliance, but I've got to swallow my dignity and just put up with it for now.

**Willow-**I've always wanted to meet an Edward and he's just like I always imagined…if only he wasn't on a separate alliance…I don't want to abandon my new friends but…his name is Edward!

**Keith-**Gene is such a tool it's not even funny. Okay, it is. I've never met someone with such a lack of personality though.

**Gene-**Keith's smugness is really getting on my nerves. But it'll just be that much sweeter when I blindside him.

* * *

(Team Trainwreck)

The team was enjoying a full course meal with all sorts of different types of food.

"Oh, this is just delish!" Dirk exclaimed giddily as he dug into some Yorkshire pudding.

"Good job today team, right," Montana added.

Not everyone was enthusiastic, though. Sooz was still more interested in her phone, and Mason was sending a few glares out every few seconds.

"I think I'll take my meal elsewhere," Missy said haughtily as she stood up with her plate.

She turned around and walked away.

"Hey, wait up, I'll go with you," Montana said as she followed.

"Oh no, don't bother," Missy scoffed. "Wouldn't you much rather be with the cool kids and just kick me while I'm down? Don't lie to me, I don't need you to keep your fakey-fake nice girl attitude!"

"I don't know what you're talking about," Montana laughed. "But I don't want my friend to eat alone."

The two girls sat down under a tree a small distance away from the group.

"Now, why you so upset?" Montana asked. "Aren't you happy that we won the reward?"

"No," Missy pouted. "They don't deserve it. They're all selfish, deceptive, and mean! But if I try to exact the justice they deserve, oh no, suddenly I become the bad guy. It's ridiculous how hypocritical some people can be."

"Ah…I, uh…well," Montana tried to think of something to say. "There are still a lot of good in them too. Why don't you focus on that instead?"

"Been there, done that," Missy scoffed. "I've seen enough of these people to know that they're going to do more harm than good. And I just can't compromise my beliefs for that!"

"Really?" Montana said. "Well, what about me? You don't think I'd intentionally try to hurt you, right?"

"Hm," Missy said thoughtfully. "…maybe not."

"Just try to give them a chance," Montana said.

"I make no promises," Missy said.

Montana just sighed.

"But…" Missy added slowly. "Thank you…for being my friend…it really does mean a lot."

"No problemo," Montana said happily.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Missy-**I'm not about to give these people any second chances. People don't change, they just don't. Anyone can fake being nice and get off without any karma, but not if I can help it! However…Montana might actually be sincere…just maybe…

**Montana-**Missy's clearly got some…issues to work out…But that's what friends are for, right. To help each other out when they need a hand dealing with things.

* * *

(Conclusion)

Chris, Chef, and Blaineley all stood at the Dock of Shame together.

"And that concludes our first reward challenge of the season," Chris announced.

"They won't all be food, though," Chef said. "Those punks are going to have to get used to my cooking."

"Next time, it's immunity again though," Blaineley said. "Who will win? Who will go home?"

"That's right," Chris said. "Will Misha's outburst cost her, or will Beatrice take the fall for her team?"

"And how bout that Missy girl?" Chef said. "Is she a dead girl walking, or can she work herself back in with her team?"

"You can bet on plenty more drama, fighting, and scheming to come," Blaineley said. "So don't miss the next episode of…Total Drama: Return of the Stars!"

_Author's Note:_ _And that's all for today. I know some of you don't care for Reward Challenges, but I really felt like I needed to space the plot out a bit, especially at the start, so that's what you get. Next chapter someone will leave though :o_


	4. Honorary Minion

_Author's Note: Hey everyone. Sorry about the wait, like I said I'm super busy now that classes have started again. I'd like to say that I'm going to begin updating regularly again...but in all honesty that's going to be really hard. All I can say is I'll update when I can, but you'll have to expect large gaps between chapters from now on._

Chris, Blaineley, and Chef all stood on the Dock of Shame as the sun rose over the island.

"Welcome, everyone, to another episode of Total Drama: Return of the Stars!" Chris exclaimed.

"Last time, we had one of those fake challenges," Chef said. "You know, where no one goes home and it's all for some puny reward."

"This didn't stop everyone from playing the strategy game hard, though," Blaineley said. "On Team Cutthroat, Willow found herself between two alliances: Zola's Good People Alliance, and an alliance that Edward threw together with Beatrice. Meanwhile, two of the most dangerous villains, Keith and Gene agreed to work together."

"Team Trainwreck was a similar case," Chris said. "Fearing that the others were already banding together, Joseph, Dirk, and Riley agreed to work together. Nicole meanwhile was forming an alliance of her own which consisted of Sooz and Mason. Montana and Missy continued to stick together, and this left Kyle right in the middle."

"It's a real challenge this time," Chef said. "So they're really going to have to work hard if they don't want to be sent home."

"So get ready for another exciting episode," Blaineley said, "of Total Drama: Return of the Stars!"

(**Theme Song Plays…**)

* * *

(Team Cutthroat)

Beatrice had gathered Edward and Willow together and dragged them into a group.

"Good morning, alliance!" she exclaimed. "Heh, I just love saying that. So what are we going to do today, alliance? Going to plan some alliance things?"

"Well, we're going to need a plan on who we want to vote out first," Edward said. "After last challenge's disaster, we've got to be prepared to be sent to the Dock of Shame."

"Oh, right, you're so smart, Edward," Willow exclaimed.

"I know," Edward said. "So, let's consider our options."

"Our options is Misha!" Beatrice exclaimed. "She's rude, mean, and she called me useless!"

"But, she's strong," Edward added. "Something we can't overlook."

"Why are you taking her side!?" Beatrice cried as she shook Edward. "Why are you turning your back on me like this!? What has she said to you to make you turn on me!?"

"N-nothing," Edward said while being shaken. "We can deal with her later, but right now we need to consider what the smartest decision is."

At that moment, Willow noticed Zola waving her over.

"Uh…I have to…go…guys," Willow said as she backed up and left.

"Now, Willow is abandoning me too!" Beatrice cried. "Why is this all happening to me!?"

"Beatrice, calm down," Edward said. "Now, let's just talk."

"Uh…okay," Beatrice said.

"So, what is your goal out here?" Edward asked.

"Oh that's simple, to be the most memorable player of the season!" Beatrice exclaimed.

"I see…" Edward said. "So, if that's the case, you're going to want to play a smart strategy, right?"

"Most definitely," Beatrice said.

"And I can help you with that, I can share my tricks of the trade," Edward said.

"Really? You'd do that for me?" Beatrice asked eagerly.

"Of course," Edward said. "Like you know what a really smart move would be? Making sure that we don't lose immunity."

"How do we do that?" Beatrice asked.

"Well, let's see we'd need strong players," Edward said. "And the strongest person is Misha…oh, but it's too bad that we're voting her out next. Oh well, I guess so much for that genius idea."

"Wait, no!" Beatrice exclaimed. "I want to make smart moves. Maybe we could keep her…if it'll help the team."

"Okay…if you say so," Edward said.

Meanwhile, Willow had reunited with Zola and Stanley.

"So, what was that all about?" Zola asked. "You seem to be getting awfully close to those two."

"They're just my new friends," Willow said. "They're really great, especially Edward."

"Well, you might want to be careful around them," Stanley suggested. "Edward doesn't seem like the most trustworthy."

"I agree," Zola said. "In fact, if he's forming alliances already, then I say we may need to vote him out next."

"Oh no, you can't do that!" Willow exclaimed. "You can't separate me from Edward!"

"Get ahold of yourself!" Zola said as she shook Willow. "You're with us, remember, and he's the enemy."

"Er, right," Willow said as she shook her head. "Sorry, I'm not sure what came over me."

From a distance, Misha spotted the group talking and grumbled to herself.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Edward-**Dealing with Beatrice is tricky business. She's very emotional…and can get a little scary. But I'm up for the challenge. I just need to appeal to her interests, while making sure she's doing what I want.

**Willow-**Oh, I don't like this situation very much. I'm loyal to my alliance to Zola and Stanley, I know that, if I have to vote out Edward…then so be it…but his name's Edward! Just thinking about him makes it painful to even consider losing him.

**Zola-**It looks like I've got some work to keep on top of everything. If people like Edward are trying to turn me own allies against me, then I'll have to strike first.

**Misha-**Everybody seems to be getting into their little alliances already. Personally, I think it's stupid, people should just be taken out based on whether they deserve to be here or not. However, these people are stupid and might just vote me out if I don't focus on the strategy side. So I may have to find an alliance of my own.

* * *

(Team Trainwreck)

Nicole sat with Sooz underneath a tree.

"So, you think we can trust Mason?" Nicole asked.

"Eh, maybe," Sooz said with her eyes glued to her tablet.

"I agree that he seems like a shady figure," Nicole said. "But he's not dumb, and he should know that he can depend on us…now we just need to make sure that we hold the majority."

"Uh-huh," Sooz said.

"What do you think?" Nicole asked.

"I think that Carmen's dress is nothing but a replica of the same thing she wore to Homecoming," Sooz said. "Like, come on, show some creativity."

"Yeah…I'm going to go talk to Montana now," Nicole said. "I think I can get her back on board with us."

Sooz stayed in place, fixated on her device. Eventually, Mason walked up to her.

"Hey," he barked. "We need to talk."

"Yeah, talk, go ahead," Sooz said. "It's a free country."

"So, if we're going to be in an alliance," Mason said, "then we need to agree on who we're voting for at the next time we go to the Dock of Shame. Have you already had any ideas?"

"Oh, I dunno," Sooz shrugged. "How about that Mason guy?"

"I'm Mason!" Mason snapped.

"Well, excuse me," Sooz scoffed. "I've already got, 1,523 friends on Facebook, how do you expect me to remember every name and face I see?"

"So, basically, you've put no thought into who to vote for?" Mason asked.

"Uh, sure, how about Joseph," Sooz suggested.

"Maybe I'll just talk to Nicole," Mason sighed.

Nicole, meanwhile, had found Montana and quickly approached her.

"Oh Montana," she said as she grabbed her shoulder. "I was hoping we could talk."

"Sure thing," Montana said as she turned around.

"I just felt like we needed to make sure we were on the same ground after these last couple days," Nicole said. "I know you're upset about the Ilona elimination, but I don't want to drive a wedge between us. I still want us to be friend."

"I want to be friends, too, right," Montana said. "I really like you, so I don't things to get nasty between us."

"Glad we agree," Nicole said. "I'll make sure to include you the next time we have to vote someone out."

"Alrighty," Montana said. "Now, hug time!"

She grabbed Nicole and hugged her tightly.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Nicole-**I trust Montana, yes, but I'm still worried about her emotional nature. She could really mess things up, so I want to make sure I've got my eye on her and keep her from doing anything crazy.

**Sooz-**I didn't come here to do any serious thinking. I'll leave that to the others, if they succeed then I get to come along for the ride, if they fail then it's not me who's getting the axe.

**Montana-**I'm willing to forgive Nicole, right. She's a nice girl and I know it; I'd really like to just be friends with her and all of us can go to the end together.

* * *

(Team Cutthroat)

Donna was eying Lionel and tapping her hand against a rock impatiently.

"Hm, I've got to be making progress on him by now," she remarked to herself.

"Morning," Lionel said as he walked past her.

"Hey there," Donna said as she placed her hand on Lionel's shoulder.

"Uh?" Lionel remarked as he eyed her.

"I was just thinking…" Donna began sweetly before changing her tone, "…that this isn't working. I've tried to be subtle, but clearly that's not getting through to you. So, let me spell it out to you. You have no allies, no one has any respect for you, and you have no game. You need an ally if you want to survive and right now I'm all you've got."

Donna had positioned herself by now to have her hands on both of Lionel's shoulders and was staring him in the eyes.

"Okay, fine, don't go crazy," Lionel said as he backed away from her. "We can align if you want. Now just leave me alone."

"You got it," Donna said.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Lionel-**I'm really not too worried, I know I'm safe. But that Donna girl seems really desperate so I might as well throw her a bone and agree to help her out. I'm sure it'll pay off once I've got her in my pocket.

**Donna-**Lionel isn't exactly someone I'm looking forward to putting up with, but I need someone dumb if I'm going to get ahead on this game, and being on the 'strategist' team, that's in short supply.

* * *

Keith was sliding down from a tree as he began to walk through the forest. Suddenly a firm hand grabbed his ponytail and dragged him aside.

"Uh…hello," he remarked as he came face to face with Misha.

"Shut up!" Misha snapped. "Here's the deal. We're aligned now, got it!?"

"Um…" Keith said.

"Good!" Misha spat. "It's simple math. You're scrawny and pathetic, plus, no one likes you, equals, you have to do exactly what I say."

"Ah, when you put it that what, it makes perfect sense," Keith said while giving an aside shrug to the camera.

"Well, duh," Misha said. "Glad we had this talk. Now, get the f**k out of my sight!"

"Uh, yes ma'am," Keith replied.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Misha-**There, I did strategy. I've got Keith on my side, and apparently he's a whiz kid when it comes to the strategy side of this game. So, with the two of us working together, nothing is going to stop me.

**Keith-**Hm, well that was…convenient, I suppose. I've got Gene on one end, and Misha on another. By the end of the day, I'll have all the idiots swarming to me like flies to honey. This game is just too easy.

* * *

Zola and Stanley were walking together along the meadow.

"So, what are you thinking?" Stanley asked.

"Same thing as before: we've got to be very careful," Zola said. "We can't trust anyone."

"Well, I think we might be able to trust Willow's judgement on Beatrice and Edward," Stanley said.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Zola replied. "That girl's got less judgement that a duck wearin' a soda wrapper around its neck."

"Huh?" Stanley remarked.

"It's a bad thing," Zola replied. "The point is, that girls got more than a few screws loose."

"That being said, I wouldn't call the others dangerous exactly," Stanley said. "The person I'm still most worried about is Keith. And then of course there's Gene, but I'm guessing you'd know more about him."

"Oh don't get me started on that sicko," Zola spat in disgust. "That boy has no soul."

"Um, excuse me?" Gene said as he approached the duo.

"Oh, whoa, back off!" Zola exclaimed as she assumed a defensive state. "We ain't in no mood to hear you're sneaky-deaky strategy talk."

"I just wanted to say you dropped your hat back there," Gene said as he tried to hand Zola her cap.

"I don't want it," Zola huffed. "You've probably infected it with evil."

"Okay then," Gene said as he turned to leave.

"Gimme that!" Zola said as she snatched the hat, rubbed it on her coat, and put it back on her head.

"So, bye," Gene said as he turned away.

"Yeah, you'd better run," Zola said.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Gene-**Ugh, things are not going smoothly for me. People won't even let me talk to them, and Zola's the worst of them all, flaunting her 'Holier Than Thou' mantra to everyone who'll listen. It looks like I might have to rely on Keith for a little longer. Just until I get my footing in this game, then I'll take control.

**Stanley-**I agree with Zola's principles, but at the same time, I feel like she could really be alienating a lot of people. She's right we're on a team of devious players, but we're going to need some of them on our good side if we don't want to be outnumbered.

* * *

(Team Trainwreck)

Kyle was eying Missy sternly from a short distance. He kept his gaze fixed on her with distaste.

"Don't you know it's rude to stare," Missy spat once she took note of him.

"I remember you," Kyle said icily. "I still haven't forgotten how you treated me."

"Well, clearly you didn't learn your lesson," Missy replied. "Because you're still as rude as I remember."

"I apologize for nothing," Kyle said. "And I just wanted to let you know that I cannot wait for the halfway mark of this season."

"Well, I'll…uh, why?" Missy asked.

"Simple logic," Kyle replied, "You were eliminated at the halfway mark of the last season, which means that to keep things balanced, you will have to leave there again. Then, and only then, shall I have the pleasure of voting you out."

"Well, maybe I'll just vote you first," Missy replied. "What do you say to that?"

"You wouldn't dare!" Kyle gasped. "I can't go before the merge in two separate seasons. It would be a crime against nature."

"I would," Missy retorted.

"I'm warning you," Kyle said, "you've made a very neutral enemy."

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Missy-**Kyle was nothing but a bossy brat in our original season, and it doesn't seem like he's changed at all. Plus he's completely wrong, there's no way I'm leaving at the halfway point again, I'm winning this season!

**Kyle-**Ugh, Missy is the most wretched person I've ever met. I swear, there's no one in my life that I hate more than her…I'd better find someone to love to balance it out…

* * *

Joseph, Dirk, and Riley were all lying in the cabin together.

"So, what's the plan for today?" Joseph asked. "If it's an elimination round, who do we want to cut loose?"

"Can't we just win?" Riley asked. "It seems like a lot less thinking."

"I wish it were that easy," Joseph laughed. "And you can both count on me to do my best to make that happen…but I don't want to be caught off guard if we do lose."

"Hm, well I'm thinking Missy," Dirk said. "She sucks the fun out of everything."

"Wouldn't be a loss in my books," Riley said.

"Yeah, I wouldn't mind seeing her go," Joseph said. "There's just one thing…"

"Huh?" Dirk asked.

"I'm worried about what Kyle said," Joseph said. "It sounds like Nicole, Sooz, and Mason are forming an alliance. And that worries me."

"Can't blame people for trying to play the game," Dirk shrugged.

"No," Joseph said, "but that's what I'm trying to do as well. If we let them get too far, they could turn the tables on us. It might be best to take them out as soon as we can. Missy is…pretty awful, but she's not exactly a threat, nobody would want to work with her. As much as I hate to say it, keeping her might be the safest route."

"Well, I don't like the idea," Dirk said. "But I trust that you know what you're doing."

"I still like my idea the best," Riley said. "You guys go ahead and win the challenge. Less work for me that way."

At that moment, Kyle entered and walked up to Dirk.

"I just wanted to let you know that I love you more than anyone else in my life right now," Kyle said.

"Oh…uh, thank you," Dirk said. "You're pretty sweet yourself."

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Joseph-**If I could, I'd like to just do what I did last time: Dominate in challenges, and let someone else do the thinking. But winning this game is top priority for me now and I need to take charge and make smart decisions too. If that means making a few sacrifices, then so be it.

**Dirk-**I never was big on the whole gameplay side of this show, which I guess is why I could put on this team. Still, I want to go far because it would be super sucky to lose before the merge again. I'll put faith in Joseph, he seems to have a good grasp on things.

**Kyle-**There, balance restored.

* * *

(Later)

The two teams arrived at the beach where the three hosts were waiting.

"Welcome to another challenge," Chris announced. "And this time, it will be for immunity again. That means that by the end of the day, one more of you will be going home."

"So, if you value your life out here, you'd better make sure you win," Chef said.

"For this challenge, you will be divided into three groups of three per tribe," Blaineley said. "That means that Team Cutthroat will need to sit someone out."

The team glanced around at each other uncertainly.

"I'll do it," Donna offered.

"Very well," Blaineley said. "Donna will not participate in this challenge."

"Now, here's how it's going to work," Chris said. "We've provided you with crates of scrap. You'll need to use your handy working skills and turn this scrap into a craft. However, it's not that simple. The first trio will be building a watercraft which they will then pilot to the nearest island. The second trio will be waiting for them there with their own supply of scraps, they'll have to transform the craft into something that can travel the wild and journey to the top of a cliff. There, they will swap with the third trio who will need to make it ready to take flight and fly it back to here. The first team to do so wins immunity."

"We'll give you some time to pick your trios, then set them up in their locations," Chef said. "Choose wisely, though, 'cause one little mistake and it could be the end of the line for you."

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Donna-**Sitting out was a bit of a risk, but then again, so would be playing in the challenge. I'm not the biggest physical asset and I don't need to show that in the challenge. If we lose, it'd be pretty easy to pin it on me and I don't need anything else working against me. If I'm sitting out then at least it's not my fault if we lose.

**Joseph-**Well, I'm disappointed that this isn't exactly a strength based challenge, but that doesn't mean that we're out of the running just yet. We can send those strategists to the Dock of Shame and even out the numbers.

* * *

(Later)

The teams had been divided up into trios. The first two trios had both been presented with their crates and were getting to work on their tasks. For Team Cutthroat, Zola, Gene, and Stanley had been put in the first trio.

"Okay, let's get to work here," Stanley said. "This won't be easy, but I think we can have a little fun with it."

Gene began to sort through the crate, but Zola stopped him.

"Whoa, not so far," Zola said. "I ain't gonna let you throw the challenge on us."

"Do I look like Scott to you?" Gene scoffed.

"Yes," Zola replied.

"I'm pretty sure that's racist…in some context," Gene remarked.

"Guys…challenge, limited time," Stanley insisted.

"Listen to him," Gene said.

"Look," Stanley said as he pulled something out of the crate. "I think this is a tarp. Maybe if we fold it properly, we can use it to keep us afloat."

"Works for me," Gene said as he continued to sort through the crate. "I'm going to work on putting a base together."

He began to work on fusing together various planks and sheets to form a shaky base for the boat. Zola continued to scrutinize him.

"You going to help?" Gene asked.

"I'm not taking my eye off you," Zola said.

Meanwhile, Sooz, Dirk, and Missy had been put into a trio for Team Trainwreck.

"Alrighty, ladies, let's get to work!" Dirk exclaimed.

"I'm on the phone," Sooz protested. "Give me a few minutes."

"Wow, that is so inconsiderate," Missy scoffed.

"Well, I guess it's just the two of us then," Dirk said.

"Hey, that's not fair!" Missy protested. "Why does she get off free, and I have to do work?"

"Uh…well…we really should get started," Dirk said.

"I'm not working until she does," Missy declared firmly.

Dirk shot a desperate glance at Sooz, but she was busy talking into her phone.

"Carlos, I'm not asking, I'm telling, I want you to buy that lottery ticket," Sooz insisted. "What do you mean you don't trust you luck? Are you calling my birthday numbers unlucky!?"

"Looks like it's just me, then," Dirk sighed as he started to sort through the crate.

He fumbled with the supplies as he awkwardly tried to put something together.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Gene-**Well, if we lose this challenge, I'm blaming Zola. She can't even get over her obsession to do a little work. If these people aren't total morons, then they'll see that she's just deadweight.

**Stanley-**Our team is definitely showing some splits between it, and I'm really hoping this doesn't affect our performance. I remember the last tribe I was on had a big division and it did not do us any favors.

**Sooz-**I'd like to help, but I have perfected the art of multitasking, and it dictates that I've got more important things to do.

**Missy-**I am all for fairness. If Sooz doesn't do any work, then I'm not doing any work. And then when people ask whose fault it is, I'll let them know that it was her. Or Kyle, because he's horrible!

* * *

(Later)

The two teams were both putting the final touches on their ships. Stanley had managed to inflate the tarp into a sort of floating device. He attached it to Gene's platform and placed it in the water to test it out. It floated.

"Now, we just need some oars," Stanley said as he searched through the crate.

"I don't know," Zola said. "Doesn't look very styling to me."

"And that's such a concern," Gene remarked dryly.

"Don't you start with me," Zola snapped.

Dirk meanwhile had only managed to find various sheets of metal, and attach them together with bungee cords.

"Uh, are you sure that's gonna float?" Sooz asked.

"No," Dirk replied.

"I expected better," Missy huffed. "How are we supposed to win if you're not giving it 100%?"

"Are you ready to take off?" Blaineley asked.

"Yes," Stanley declared as he team got into the boat.

"I guess," Dirk said dejectedly as he pushed his craft into the water.

It wavered slightly and he quickly tried to keep it supported so it wouldn't sink.

"I'm not sure if I feel safe in that," Missy remarked.

"Well too bad," Chef said. "Cause you need to, if you want to win."

"Hm, I do like winning," Missy sighed as she nervously got on the boat.

"Alright, go!" Chris exclaimed.

Team Cutthroat took off rowing and pulled ahead. Team Trainwreck tried to row, but found that they were sinking into the water.

"Quick, row faster!" Dirk exclaimed.

Sooz, however, was still much more engulfed in her long-distance conversation.

"Give me that!" Missy snapped as she grabbed the phone from Sooz.

"Hey, I need that!" Sooz cried. "You can't do that!"

"You want it, go get it!" Missy exclaimed as she tossed the phone into the water.

"Noooo!" Sooz exclaimed as she grabbed a paddle and started to row furiously.

"I think they're gaining on us," Gene remarked to his team.

"Faster," Stanley said. "Let's keep the lead on our side."

The team picked up the speed, but Sooz's newfound energy was paying off for Team Trainwreck.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Missy-**I'm so smart. I know, I'm too good for this team.

**Zola-**In all honesty, losing wouldn't even be so bad. We could trim out some of the cancer in our tribe. Not that I plan on losing, of course, I ain't no challenge-throwing villain.

* * *

(Island)

Team Cutthroat arrived with a very miniscule lead and carried the boat to shore. There, Misha, Edward, and Willow were waiting.

"We'll take it from here," Edward said.

Team Trainwreck arrived, not too far behind. Joseph, Riley, and Nicole were waiting at this station.

"Here you go," Missy said as she dragged the board to the shore. "Have fun."

"Now we can go look for your phone," Dirk said to Sooz.

"It's okay, I've got extras," Sooz said as she reached into her bandana and pulled out another phone.

"Then…why did you freak out just now?" Dirk asked.

"I tend to get a little hectic when I see technology being abused like that," Sooz replied.

Misha immediately took charge of her team.

"Come on, we need to be full speed!" she barked at her teammates. "We can't let them claim the lead!"

"I'm going as fast as I can," Willow said as she peeled off the tarp.

"Faster, faster, we don't have time to waste!" Misha ordered.

Edward carried a tire over from the crate, but Misha grabbed it from him and rolled it over to the craft.

"Quick, find a way to attach this," Misha ordered.

"Uh…yes, ma'am," Willow said uncertainly as she tried to work with the tire.

"Double your efforts!" Misha spat at Edward. "We're losing time!"

"Sorry, I'm not a superhuman, Your Majesty," Edward scoffed.

"You should be," Misha spat back.

Meanwhile, Team Trainwreck was also working on their craft.

"Hm, I have an idea…but it might take a little time," Nicole suggested.

"What is it?" Joseph asked.

"Chris said we need to go up a mountain," Nicole said, "so I'm thinking we can use some of these ropes and hooks to make a sort of grappling hook contraption. It might give us the edge if we can put it together."

"Hm, that could be a risk," Joseph said. "But I'd be willing to give it a shot."

"Hey that's great," Riley said as he collapsed on the platform. "Let me know how that works out."

Nicole began to work tying together the hooks, while Joseph grabbed a wheel, and started to put together a way to launch and rappel the hooks.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Misha-**Obviously, I don't expect these wimps to match my skill, but I might as well try to get them working on these challenges while the team phase is in effect.

**Nicole-**Our team is actually a bit of a mixed bag. While we've got a lot of strong players, we've also got a lot of freeloaders…I just hope that that doesn't hold us back.

* * *

(Later)

"Ready for takeoff?" Chef asked.

"Let's do this!" Willow exclaimed from inside their cart.

"You guys seem to have an interesting device," Chris remarked as he examined Team Trainwreck's vehicle.

It was simply their panel, but with a boxy wheel attached at the end.

"Let's just hope it works," Nicole said.

"Go!" Blaineley exclaimed.

Misha, Edward, and Willow began to crank on their wheels. They slowly started to move forward.

"Ugh, this is taking forever!" Misha grunted.

"My arms are sore already," Willow sighed.

"Too bad," Misha said. "We aren't slowing down now."

"This is futile," Edward sighed.

"Hey, look at the others," Willow said. "They're not moving."

Nicole was actually positioning the grapple device.

"Come on, don't fail me now," she said.

She fired it. The hook shot up and dug into a tree. As the contraption pulled on the rope, the vehicle was dragged forward.

"Whoa…that's totally unfair," Willow said. "Awesome, but unfair."

"Quit your whining and keep this thing rolling," Misha ordered.

Team Trainwreck's grapple device continue to pay off as they took a strong lead on the others. Misha went into double duty as she used all her strength to keep the wheels rolling. Their cart bounced along the rocky ground as they tried to make up distance. Team Trainwreck had a strong lead though. They continued to use the grapple device and travelled from tree to tree. However, eventually Riley bounced over the edge and rolled onto the ground.

"Uh…oops," Nicole remarked.

"Quick, let's get him back on before the others catch up," Joseph said.

Riley hadn't even been awoken by the tumble. He was still sleeping happily in the dirt. As Joseph hopped off the platform and grabbed him, Team Cutthroat managed to catch up. Willow and Edward looked absolutely exhausted, but upon seeing the other team, Misha seemed to have a new fire in her eyes.

"Aha, they're slowing down!" she exclaimed. "We can catch up!"

She continued to crank the wheels with strong force and kept the cart rolling ahead. Joseph grabbed Riley and tossed him onto the platform before hopping on and joining him.

"Go, go, go!" he ordered to Nicole.

"Right," Nicole said as she launched the hook again.

The two teams soon came to a slope.

"Well, this is going to be tricky," Nicole said as she looked up the slope.

"Let's just make sure we don't lose our grip," Joseph said.

Nicole nodded before using the grapple device to cling to a jutting rock. Team Cutthroat came up from behind them.

"I…can't…go…on," Willow wheezed.

"Yes you can," Misha replied uninterestedly. "Keep moving."

"I feel like…my arms are going to…snap off," Edward said.

"Wait till after we win the challenge," Misha said. "Then you can break every f**king bone in your body."

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Edward-**Misha is…quite the little brat. True, she does provide strength…but is it worth the cost?

**Joseph-**Looks like we might actually have the lead. If we can keep it that way, then great, we'll be on even footing again.

* * *

(Later)

Team Trainwreck kept the lead and arrived at the top of the cliff where Kyle, Montana, and Mason were waiting for them.

"Get to work, guys," Nicole said as she hopped out.

"Alrighty, this is gonna be fun, right," Montana said. "We're gonna go flying!"

"Let's see what we've got," Mason said as he opened up the crate.

"Anything…flighty?" Montana asked.

"Stop!" Kyle exclaimed. "We must first organize these objects by size, otherwise we'll be dealing with pure pandemonium."

Montana and Mason just glanced at each other, before continuing to search. Team Cutthroat had arrived by now. Willow and Edward both collapsed on the ground gratefully. Misha dragged the cart over to Beatrice, Lionel, and Keith.

"Don't f**k it up, guys," Misha barked.

"We're going to need to act quick if we want to pull ahead," Keith said.

"Quick, you got it!" Beatrice exclaimed as she started to toss things out of the crate rapidly.

One of them hit Lionel in the head and knocked him to the ground.

"Lookie, balloons!" Beatrice exclaimed as she revealed some deflated balloons. "We can work with these."

Montana and Mason meanwhile were working on putting some wings together.

"If we sew some fabric on the edge here, we might be able to get some sails, right," Montana said. "That'll carry us over the wind."

"No, no, no, this is all wrong!" Kyle cried. "This side is disproportion by 2 centimetres. Disproportionate I say!"

"And does anybody care?" Mason asked.

"Yes," Kyle said as he stepped between the two, "and he's not going to let you continue with this mockery."

"Have it your way," Mason said as he shoved Kyle to the ground.

"Oh, was that really necessary?" Montana asked.

"He was asking for it," Mason replied.

Team Cutthroat meanwhile was inflating balloons and tying them to the cart. Lionel had gotten back up and was working on detaching the wheels.

"Are you sure this is going to work?" Keith asked uncertainly as he and Beatrice continued to add balloons.

"Positive," Beatrice said. "I mean, it's the same principle as a hot air balloon."

"Well, we've got plenty of hot air," Keith remarked as he glanced at Lionel.

"Did someone say 'hot?'" Lionel asked.

"Just keep working," Keith said.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Beatrice-**Oh this is so awesome, we're going to float right into victory and everyone will love me!

**Kyle-**We're doomed to lose now; doomed! Without proper balance our plane will never work, and then we'll have to vote someone else up and upset the balance further…and this confessional isn't a perfect square!

* * *

(Later)

Team Cutthroat had finished their craft and was ready to take off. The balloons fluttered in the wind.

"You guys ready?" Chef asked.

"Let's do this!" Beatrice exclaimed.

"What about you guys?" Blaineley asked to Team Trainwreck.

"Can we do this?" Mason asked Montana.

"It's not done yet, right," Montana said. "I'd rather be sure than sorry."

"Well, too bad," Chris said, "since Team Cutthroat is done, they can head off."

Team Cutthroat launched their craft over the edge of the cliff. The wind swept up the balloons and they hovered downward.

"It's working!" Keith exclaimed. "We're doing this!"

A few minutes later and Team Trainwreck were ready to take off.

"3…2…1…blastoff!" Montana exclaimed as they thrust over the edge of the cliff.

"We're going to die!" Kyle fired as he hung to Mason.

The wind caught the wings and they soared gently downward. They soon caught up with the others.

"Quick, we need to turn up the gas!" Lionel exclaimed.

"There is no gas," Keith pointed out.

"We can still do this!" Beatrice said.

Suddenly, one of their balloons popped.

"Uh," she said.

Then another…and another, and another. Soon they were plummeting straight into the water.

"Um…we can still win," Beatrice said as they surfaced. "Just…keep rowing…with your hands."

However, their efforts were in vain. Team Trainwreck's plane landed safely in the starting point.

"WOOHOO!" Montana cheered. "We did it!"

"Hmph, we got lucky," Kyle remarked. "Next time we won't be so safe."

"Congratulations, Team Trainwreck!" Chris exclaimed. "You have won immunity for tonight. None of you will be going home."

The team cheered.

"As for Team Cutthroat," Blaineley said. "…"

Chef helped Keith, Lionel, and Beatrice out of the water.

"…one of you will be going home tonight," Blaineley said. "You'll get the rest of the day to discuss and make your decision. Make it wisely, and we'll see you at the Dock of Shame."

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Misha-**F**k this! I can't believe my god-awful team somehow managed to find a way to lose yet another challenge. Someone WILL pay for this!

**Montana-**We did it, we did it, we're number one, we're number one!

**Donna-**Well, that's just fantastic. Now I've really got to go into overdrive, or it could be curtains for me.

**Keith-**To be honest, I'm not even that upset we lost. I've been itching to get an elimination over with on our team.

**Zola-**Time to put operation…uh…we're still working on the snazzy name…but it's going into action tonight!

* * *

(Team Cutthroat)

Donna sat with Lionel.

"Alright, we need to make sure that I'm not going home tonight," Donna said.

"Don't worry, I haven't heard your name come up," Lionel said.

"Uh, have you talked to anyone about strategy?" Donna asked.

"No, but I assume if they wanted something they'd come to get my vote eventually," Lionel replied.

"Well, I'm not so sure," Donna said. "We're two votes in 10."

"Hi guys!" Keith exclaimed as he swung from a nearby tree. "Whatcha doing?"

"Uh, talking," Lionel said.

"Might I ask what you're doing?" Donna replied.

"Just dropping by," Keith replied. "I can't help but feel a drop of sympathy for you, Donna. Absolutely hopeless just because of how you played last time. It's not easy being the 'villain.' Well, it is if you're me, but that's not your case."

"Yeah, are you just here to rub it in my face that I'm basically doomed tonight?" Donna asked.

"Well, that would be fun," Keith said. "But what can I say, I have a soft spot for you, and maybe we can help each other out. I heard that there was an anti-villain alliance going on; maybe we can counter there with an anti-anti-villains alliance."

"Uh, how about just the villains alliance?" Donna suggested.

"That works too," Keith said.

"But that's still only three," Donna said.

"Oh yeah, I think I've also got Misha…and maybe Gene," Keith said.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm here too," Misha said as she approached the group. "So this is our alliance? Whatever, works for me, let's just get this over with."

"And Gene?" Donna asked.

"Eh, he's probably out failing at strategy somewhere," Keith said. "But now we've got four, and that might be enough to make a move and take somebody out."

"I like the sound of it," Donna said. "To the Villains."

"Hey, whoa, I am NOT a villain," Lionel protested.

"You're right, you're nowhere near as competent as the rest of us," Donna remarked. "I move to make him an honorary minion."

"I'll second that motion," Keith said.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Donna-**I definitely do not trust Keith, but he is still in the same position that I am in. We're going to have to stick together to survive the first couple rounds out here and I can work with that.

**Keith-**Now the question is who do we vote off? One of those goody-goods, useless Beatrice, or I even wouldn't mind sending Gene home, I don't need him anymore.

**Lionel-**I knew it was only a matter of time before an alliance flocked around me.

**Misha-**So, I got an alliance. Fantastic. Now I can stop focusing on the strategy aspect and just work on getting myself to the merge.

* * *

"Okay, folks, who's it gonna be?" Zola asked. "That creepo, Gene? That rat, Keith? That snob, Edward?"

"Not Edward!" Willow exclaimed.

The trio was meeting behind the cabin again.

"Girl, remember that talk we had this morning?" Zola said to Willow.

"I know, I know," Willow said. "But I'm just saying, why can't we all work together? I really think it would be good for all of us."

"You know, I'm tempted to agree with her," Stanley said. "Five is stronger than three, and we're going to need numbers on our side if we want to actually make a move."

"Fine," Zola said. "But don't lose track of who your real friends are."

Willow then walked over to Edward and Beatrice who were sitting in the meadow.

"Hey guys!" she exclaimed. "I just—"

"Oh, I was looking for you three!" Gene exclaimed as he joined the three. "I wanted to talk about the vote."

"Let me guess, not you?" Edward asked.

"Hilarious," Gene remarked dryly. "Look, I really think it should be Zola. You should have seen her at the challenge. Instead of doing any work she just followed me like a hawk. If that's how she's going to act then we're better off without her."

"You make a valid point," Edward said.

An awkward silence followed.

"Leave, please," Edward said.

Gene just grumbled as he walked off.

"So, guys, instead of voting out Zola-who's totally awesome by the way-I was thinking maybe we could work with her," Willow said.

"Hm, I doubt she'd be too fond of me," Edward remarked.

"Are you kidding? Who couldn't like you?" Willow exclaimed.

"Her?" Edward replied.

"Well…I just talked to her…and uh…she said 'fine'…in referring to you," Willow said. "So clearly she thinks you're fine."

"Hm," Edward replied.

"Come on," Willow said. "She's way more trustworthy than Gene is. Gene ended up hurting a lot of people in our season together."

"Willow, I'd like some alone time with Beatrice," Edward said.

"Oh…okay," Willow said as she backed up.

Edward then turned to Beatrice.

"She seems to be under Zola's thumb, and I don't like it," Edward said. "Maybe we should just vote her out."

"You think it's best?" Beatrice asked.

"I'm not sure," Edward said. "Right now I want to make the safest move. Zola could be dangerous if she gets into power…and yet Gene could be dangerous too if we let him slide by."

"This is a toughie," Beatrice remarked.

"Well, we'll have to make a decision sooner or later," Edward said.

* * *

**Confessional:**

**Zola-**I'll let Edward into the alliance for now…but he tries to pull anything and he's outta here!

**Stanley-**Hopefully tonight will go simple…but knowing these guys, nothing is ever simple.

**Willow-**I really hope this works. I don't want besties to be fighting on either side.

**Gene-**These people had better not be talking about voting me out. I've done nothing wrong at all this season. I haven't had a chance to, no one will talk to me! And Zola cost us the challenge, it's simple, she has to go.

**Edward-**Ugh, I was hoping to avoid tough decision so early on, but here I am. Zola or Gene?

* * *

(Dock of Shame)

Blaineley, Chris, and Chef stood at the Dock of Shame as the ten contestants arrived and sat down on stumps.

"Welcome Team Cutthroat to your first elimination," Chris said. "One of the ten of you will be leaving tonight, and will become the second person voted out of Total Drama: Return of the Stars."

"You guys are the strategists, so I'm expecting that this vote is going to be pretty spectacular," Blaineley said.

Everyone looked around uncertainly.

"But the fact of the matter is, one of you blew it and there's no coming back for you," Chef said.

"Now, let's get these Golden Marshmallows handed out," Chris said. "First one goes to…"

…

"Lionel!"

"Duh," Lionel remarked as he accepted his prize.

"Another one," Blaineley said, "for…"

…

"Stanley!"

"And…" Chef said. "…"

…

"Willow!"

….

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"Beatrice!"

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"Misha!"

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"Keith!"

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"Donna!"

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"Edward!"

This just left Gene and Zola. Gene was rolling his eyes, while Zola was glaring at him.

"Gene, Zola," Blaineley said. "One of you will be going home. However the person who is safe is…"

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

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…

…

…

…

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"Zola!"

"Woo, you just got owned, scumbag!" Zola shouted at Gene.

"Bah," Gene scoffed. "You people are terrible."

"Sorry, Gene," Keith remarked. "You just suck at this game. Accept it."

"Gene, time for you to go," Chris said.

"I'm outta here," Gene said as he walked down the Dock of Shame and stepped into the Boat of Losers.

"Well, congratulations to the other nine of you," Chris said. "You survived your first elimination. Now, get back to winning challenges or else another one of you will be joining Gene."

* * *

**Votes:**

**Zola-**Gene, I've decided that you're the worst. Time for you to go.

**Stanley-**Gene, after your performance in Switcheroo no one wants to trust you and I don't blame them, this game was over for you before it even began.

**Keith-**You were fun, Gene, but it's time to let you go. I've got a game to win.

**Edward-**Gene, you're unpredictable. I don't need you messing up my game down the road.

**Beatrice-**The plan tonight is to vote for Gene. I sure hope it's not me getting blindsided, though.

**Donna-**The villain's alliance is in place…and Gene, you're not part of it, so time for you to go.

**Misha-**Gene, get the f**k out.

**Willow-**Gene, you'd never be my bestie in a million years.

**Lionel-**Gene, I'd like to say I care…but I really don't.

**Gene-**Zola, you are absolutely useless and you will only hold us back if you stay.

* * *

(Conclusion)

"And so we say goodbye to Gene," Chris said. "One of the most deadly villains of his season, but he couldn't compete in this All-Stars world."

"With Gene gone, though, what will unfold on Team Cutthroat?" Blaineley asked. "Will the Villains take control? Will the 'Wolf Pack' get them out? Will Edward have to pick a side?"

"Don't forget the other team too," Chef added. "There's tension just waiting to burst. Will they keep winning challenges, or will the divide continue to grow."

"Find out next time," Chris said. "On Total Drama: Return of the Stars!"

_Author's Note: And that does it for Gene. Gene, like Ilona, was someone I added towards the end because I needed a big character who deserved to be on All-Stars, but would work as an early boot. I originally considered having one of the major villains for first, but I decided that'd be too simple for an All-Star season. Instead I wanted to have a bit of a fakeout with Gene, as in "He's not the first boot, so he must be going far.' But in the end, Gene's story was simply that he was screwed from the moment the game began, no matter what sort of strategy he tried to play, no one would ever want to work with him, not even the other villains. So, it's bye-bye Gene. See you next time ^_^_


End file.
